Donna's Daily Grind

January 22, 2011

2012-01-22T09:01:00.003-05:00

There is a time for everything - no matter how hard you try to avoid certain things - it's going to happen.

All my life I've kept a carefully crafted, beautifully built brick wall around my heart. It was the only place I felt safe, truly safe. Nobody could hurt me because you never got close enough.

Last year my word was Foundation - and I worked on shoring up my spiritual, emotional and physical selves. I turned 50. I went to Brave Girls Camp in July 2010. I had even started going back to church. I knew that eventually that wall was going to have to come down - but all of 2010 I managed to avoid the wrecking ball.

I have a pretty good sense when I meet people who I know can see the wall and I will do pretty much anything to avoid them. I'm good at that too.

Brave Girls Camp was the beginning - with that sign at the end of the path - telling me I was safe there. That set the old fight and flight survival mechanism into full blown alert. I knew the time was coming for me to start cleaning out old wounds - ridding myself of infection and begin to heal.

My church is amazing! It's full of totally imperfect people who are loved by a perfect God. Crossroads Vineyard really strives to be an outward focused church and at the same time, attending to the very broken and very imperfect people who are members. Our church has small groups that meet once a week for a semester and discuss various topics. You develop relationships - warm, caring, loving relationships with these people and wouldn't you know it....there was someone in the group who could see my carefully concealed wall. Danger, Will Robinson, Danger! The alerts were sounded - additional defenses needed to be deployed to keep the wall secure! God has a way of putting the right people in the right place - just when you need them.

For now - lets just say that wall has been severely damaged and for the first time in many, many years, light is coming through - shining in the dark places, shattering the fear, and I'm not interested in rebuilding the wall - I'm actually WONDERING - what is on the other side.

It's time to start cultivating the other side of the wall - and seeing what amazing things life can bring.

Stay tuned.

HELLO 2012!

2012-01-02T10:08:00.003-05:00

Happy New Year everyone!

Yes, it's been a while since I updated my blog - but here I am!

My 2012 Word is - CULTIVATE. I put a lot of effort into selecting this word, in fact, I had almost decided to NOT have a word this year - nothing seems to click.

Last year my word was FOUNDATION. I wanted to build a solid foundation in my life in three areas: Mental, Physical and Spiritual.

This year I want to expand those areas and really pour into those same areas and add one more: Photography.

So with the definition of CULTIVATE being:

a. To improve and prepare by plowing or fertilizing.

b. To loosen or dig soil around (growing plants).

2. To grow or tend (a plant or crop).

3. To promote the growth of (a biological culture).

4. To nurture; foster.

5. To form and refine, as by education.

6. To seek the acquaintance or goodwill of; make friends with.

This word really describes how I want to continue to grow and nurture these areas of my life - to prune and weed the areas that need attention, to fertilize those areas by learning and doing things that are good for me.

Next week I start Body Restoration with Brave Girls and on February 1st I will be taking a class by Joanne Sharpe on lettering, and I will be doing some other online courses that are photography based.

Looking forward to 2012 and it's changes and challenges - Bring It On!

Happy Fall!

2011-09-23T06:56:00.000-04:00

Fall is my most favorite time of the year EVER! I actually prefer "fall cleaning " over spring cleaning because I want the all ready and clean for the holidays.

August and September are insanely busy at our office - working for a govt contractor who sells IT products makes us a good place to spend all your hard earned tax dollars on things like IPADS, computer upgrades, etc. But as a fiscal conservative, that topic makes me extremely crabby - so lets skip that.

Been working on my photography skills - Here are a couple of pictures I've taken.

I've known Rachel for at least 10 years now - and I love her like a sister. We did their engagement and wedding photos too. Little Baby Lester is due early October!

Can't wait to blog more - since I hate the new FB changes - I'll just move my internet time to blogs.

Little Secrets of Life....

2011-08-28T09:17:00.004-04:00

I found this wonderful list through a pin from Cynthia Pipitone on Pinterest. That website has brought me so much inspiration for all aspects of my life - I had to share Part 1 with you. I found this on BellaMumma (which I bookmarked!)

Enjoy!

1. Memorize something everyday. Not only will this leave your brain sharp and your memory functioning, you will also have a huge library of quotes to bust out at any moment. Poetry, sayings and philosophies are your best options.

2. Constantly try to reduce your attachment to possessions. Those who are heavy-set with material desires will have a lot of trouble when their things are taken away from them or lost. Possessions do end up owning you, not the other way around. Become a person of minimal needs and you will be much more content.

3. Develop an endless curiosity about this world. Become an explorer and view the world as your jungle. Stop and observe all of the little things as completely unique events. Try new things. Get out of your comfort zone and try to experience as many different environments and sensations as possible. This world has so much to offer, so why not take advantage of it?

4. Remember people’s names so that they feel appreciated and for your own future benefit when you want something from that person. To do this, say their name back to them when they introduce themselves. Then repeat the name in your head a number of times until you are sure you have it. Continue to use their name in conversation as much as possible to remove any chance of forgetting it. If you’re still having trouble, make up a rhyme about their name: “Dan the Man” or “Natalie flatters me.”

5. Get fit! It’s ridiculous to think that we have one body, one sole means of functioning, and people are too lazy to take care of themselves. Fit bodies lead to better health, confidence and more success with romantic endeavours. Three very good reasons to get in shape.

6. Learn to focus only on the present. The past is unchangeable so it is futile to reflect on it unless you are making sure you do not repeat past mistakes. The future is but a result of your actions today. So learn from the past to do better in the present so that you can succeed in the future.

7. Even more specifically, live in THIS moment. Even 10 minutes ago is the past. If you live purely in this moment you will always be happy because there is nothing wrong in this split-second.

8. Smile more often. Whenever you get a grin on your face, your brain is releasing serotonin, the happy hormone. Smiling is the natural way to force yourself to be happy. Many people even smile for five minutes straight in the morning to get themselves in a great mood for the day. It is a very powerful tool that is utilized less and less as we grow older and need happiness more than ever. Just remember that while happiness leads to smiles, smiles also lead to happiness.

9. Drink water. Hydration is tremendously important for overall health. Fizzy drinks have absolutely ZERO nutritional content; it’s like pouring a punch of sugar and syrup into your cup. Instead, fill it with life-replenishing water. It may taste plain at first if you’re coming off of a heavy soda-drinking streak, but you’ll soon find yourself addicted to it. 10 glasses per day is optimal, how many have you been getting lately?

10. Don’t take life so seriously! Learn to laugh at the little things and this whole “existence” thing will be a whole lot easier. Be amused by your mistakes and failures and be thankful that you learned your lesson and won’t mess up like that again. And most importantly do things that you enjoy! Life is not strictly business, it can be mixed with pleasure.

11. Think positive thoughts. When you find yourself thinking a negative thought, stop it immediately by any means necessary. Slap yourself in the face, yell something positive at the top of your lungs or jump up and down. Do whatever it takes to get back to a positive mindset as such is essential for continual happiness and success.

12. Read more. No explanation needed.

13. Get in the sun. Superman was completely re-energised when he flew out to space and soaked in some rays and you can do the same right outside your front door. The sun feels amazing: your entire body will be coursing with warmth and life ~ just remember your SPF.

14. Help others. Here's a plethora of reasons why this is a MUST

* Helping people has a ripple effect. If you help someone they will feel more obliged to help someone else, and so on. Pay it forward.

* You grow by giving and helping others. It can change you in ways you never expected.

* Your relationship with that person will become stronger.

* It’s the most fulfilling thing you can do on this planet. It not only feels amazing physically, you also feel like a good person.

* You might be able to call in a favour later when you need some help.

* Karma {if you believe in it}.

* Because there are more people in this world than just you.

15. Set aside a specific time to worry each day. Ponder all of your problems and anxieties during that time so that they will not distract you during work or moments of pleasure. This way you can be extremely efficient with your time and avoid focusing on negative things as much as possible. If you get all of your worry out of the way and have the mental fortitude to keep from reverting back to them, you will be much happier on the daily.

16. Be honest at all times. Lies lead to nothing but trouble. Being known as trustworthy is an excellent trait to maintain and essential to having integrity.

17. Figure out what your goals and dreams are. So many people wander aimlessly through life simply go for whatever small thing they want moment by moment. Instead, decide what your perfect life consists of and begin to put the steps in motion to reach that place. The most satisfying thing in the world is overcoming a challenge and reaching a goal. We are the happiest when we are growing and working towards something better.

18. Start your day off right. Wake up and set aside an hour for personal development activities {meditation, self-introspection, observing nature, etc.} Do the things that make you feel blissful, optimistic and empowered so that you can set a positive tone for your day. Once you start doing this, your days will be more enjoyable and fulfilling. Today is going to be the best day of your life.

19. Travel. Anyone who has ever gone anywhere will tell you that traveling is one of the most exciting and life-changing activities that you can do. Observing a different culture will expand your mind while making you further appreciate the life you already live. This goes back to becoming an explorer: this world is your jungle so go explore! Who knows, maybe you’ll find a place you love so much that you decide to move. Imagine the positive repercussions a new environment could have on your life.

20. Learn to be unaffected by the words of others. Most people get very upset when they are called negative names by others, but there is a simple trick to overcoming this. Here it is: If you were called you a fire hydrant, would you be upset? Of course not. Obviously you are not a fire hydrant, you are a human being. The same concept applies to when someone calls you something that you know you are not. They are foolish for saying such things, so why would you react with such anger? The only exception is when someone calls you something that is true! In this case, you should thank them for alerting you to a weakness, one that you can now work on changing.

21. Develop the ability to forgive. Forgiveness is something that most people fail miserably at even thought it’s so simple. Grudges only bring more misery to those who hold them and prevent good relations with the target. YOU makes mistakes all of the time so why not have mercy when other do? Remaining angry feels horrible while forgiving someone brings a refreshing sensation to the mind and healing to the relationship.

Erika and Reuben's Wedding

2011-08-22T19:45:00.008-04:00

Mike and I had the honor of photographing Erika and Reuben's wedding on Saturday, August 20th. Such a beautiful young couple. I have to admit, I love weddings. I especially love photographing weddings. I would rather work my butt off at a wedding shoot than to do anything I do at my regular job now. I love capturing those special moments at such an intimate event. I want to do this - ALL the time - Like for my job.

Here are a few, basically unedited pictures. I have 1,029 photo's to edit.

So maybe an event planner and photography business?????

SLOW DOWN - Take Time to Smell the Roses....

2011-08-13T09:14:00.002-04:00

Or to read a good book, give your honey a smooch, read a story to your child, sit on your porch and enjoy a cup of coffee.

For the first time in weeks, I don't have any where I have to be on a Saturday morning. Yes, the house needs cleaning and laundry needs done - those things are always there for me. I'm sitting here drinking my second cup of coffee and I feel guilty that I'm not mopping the kitchen floor already and laundry isn't going and my bed isn't made.

WHY? Why do I feel that way and why do so many other women with hectic schedules feel guilty about taking some time to just - be still and enjoy some of the simple joys of life? We have some odd requirement that if everything isn't crossed of our "to-do" list that we don't deserve some time to just enjoy a few minutes of quiet.

Silly isn't it?

Yet...I sit here, just about in a panic because I'm not multi-tasking. Did you know multi-tasking doesn't really exist? We really aren't capable of doing multiple things well and give each task our best effort. My old therapist told me that.

So what are you doing to enjoy your life today?

(I need to get the laundry going!)

So long....Farewell....

2011-08-02T08:33:00.002-04:00

To my 40's!

Hello 50's and all you have to offer!

I've made no secret that I turned 50 on July 22! I was so excited about this milestone in life!

My 40's were not my favorite time in my life. First - not everything was bad and there was lots of good and great things that happened. For example - I had a hysterectomy - BEST thing I ever did - why I waited so long is beyond me! I married my wonderful husband and best friend, Mike Johnson. I discovered Scrapbooking and a world of new friends and an amazing creative release (not to mention releasing some dollars!). I had my own online scrapbook store for a while and there is soooo much more!

Some things that weren't so good: I lost my mother during this time. It's sad to see someone's mind deteriorate and the person you knew and loved slowly slip away. I also had expectations of huge money being made on land deals and quitting my full time job and living the life of leisure - sort of an early retirement and well....with the down turn in the economy - that didn't happen. I was, and still am, doing a job I have no love for. I pouted. I was angry and resentful. I spent years lamenting the loss of what I never really had. I literally pissed away (sorry for the language) years of my life and not seeing all the beauty life does have to offer.

Sometimes life happens. Plans change. But one thing is certain - if you keep looking back you will never move forward.

No more regrets for me. Life is out there - with endless possibilities and I'm going out to grab everything I can.

So long 40's. Hello 50's and all you have to offer. This Brave Girl is on her way - it's time.

Brave Girls Camp #2

2011-07-24T07:52:00.004-04:00

Melody, Kathy and their staff thought of every detail in preparing for our arrival. As I entered the house, I was overwhelmed with what I saw and what I was feeling. As I looked around at other guests it was evident that others were having similar experiences.

The room was decorated with swags/banners of tulle, lights and pictures of us, our family, our pets. The dining tables were beautifully set and there was a beverage station - which I call "My Coffee Station". I had mentioned how I liked my coffee and they made sure to have good coffee, splenda and half and half. It was perfect.

Dinner was served shortly after our arrival. A delicious salad with sweet pork. I think there should be a Brave Girls Cookbook! While we were eating, Marq and Brock carried our luggage to our rooms. Every was chatting and getting to know each other - still not quite sure what the entire week was going to hold.

When the dishes were cleared away, we gathered on the Red Carpet and Melody and Kathy went over what to expect for the week - and we had to wait until Wednesday to see the Art Room! So we each shared a little about ourselves and what we hoped to get out of camp. The sense of safety I felt was immediate and powerful. Being in a room with so many amazing women was incredible.

We all went to our rooms to get ready for bed - my first nights sleep was not the best - but I was soooo excited to get in the Art Room!

When one lives in the Washington DC area (or probably any major metropolitan area for that matter) - you become hard, short tempered, and generally not the nicest person. Getting way from this area was so refreshing. There really ARE nice people out there.

Enjoy the photos!

Thoughts on Brave Girls Camp #1

2011-07-18T19:18:00.002-04:00

For me, BGC was a life changing event. So much so that it will be impossible for me to share everything, much less attempt to do so in one post. So I'll share with everyone in segments.

I was introduced to the Daily Truth emails by my good friend, Lisa Wallace. Those daily emails often times had the right words for the right time. Soon I discovered there was a Brave Girls Camp and my other good friend, Sandi Tygar (aka Tigger) decided to be Brave and sign up to attend camp the week of July 11th, almost 14 months before the event.

I took the Soul Restoration I online course, which I admit, I did not finish. The time line assignment was just overwhelming to me - it was making me face things I was not ready to face. I loved the course, but the unaddressed issues - well - I knew the time to address them was going to be coming - soon.

As the trip got closer, I began to waiver on my commitment to attend. I was coming up with "reasons" for me not to attend - but deep down, I knew this was part of my journey that I needed to finally complete. I had also given my word to Tigger that I was attending and I did not want to let her down. I never told her of my doubts about attending.

Let me say - I am so glad I made that journey.

As we arrived in a parking lot in McCall, we were greeted by Melody and some staff. We got off the bus and took the bird seed in our packages and Melody said it represented our worries, fears, stress, etc and to toss it in the air and let it fall to the ground. She said that is where the worries, fears, etc. would stay for the duration of Camp and that we were welcome to come pick them up on our way home. I did not go retrieve my birdseed - LOL.

Then we got back on the bus and headed to the cabin. I felt panic and fear set in. I'm positive I was not the only woman on the bus feeling that. As we pulled up, every single staff member was lined up to greet us. I got to the path leading to the cabin and a sign said "I am safe". It was at that moment that I knew it was time to face those issues from my childhood and let go.

BGC is not a religious event, but for me it was deeply spiritual. I felt God telling me - you have always been safe and its time to open up those infected wounds and let the infection drain out so you can heal. God provided an environment where I felt safe to finally after all these years, to open up and share what I went through as a little girl and that I had allowed that to keep me from being all that I was meant to be.

Thank you Melody and Kathy - for all you do. It is needed in this world and I am grateful for the safe place you have provided for us.

....Stay tuned for more updates.

Life Changing...Is An Understatement....

2011-07-17T18:30:00.007-04:00

I got home a few hours ago from Brave Girls Camp.

Wow.

Amazing.

Inspirational.
Encouraging.
Challenging.
Loving.

Life Changing.

and that was just on the first day.

I will share some things over the next few days about my experience at Brave Girls Camp.

What Melody and Kathy have created is more than art - it was a life retreat. I love them both dearly.

Happy 4th of July....

2011-07-04T16:40:00.005-04:00

It's the end of the 4th of July Weekend and it's been wonderful.

I'm relaxed. I got stuff done around the house. I created. I spent time with family. I don't even care that tomorrow is work! It's a 4 day work week and then off to Brave Girls Camp with my friend Sandi Tygar (aka - Tigger).

Found this amazing saying on Pinterest.com. I love going there and finding all kinds of cool stuff. I'm actually going to print this out and take it to work with me.

Here is a pic of a canvas I made for my friend at work - she doesn't do blogs or fb or anything -so she will be surprised!

AND I got PINK hair extensions in my hair! I have to say - I was nervous at first - mostly excited, but still nervous. Let me tell you - next time....I'm getting the color put in my hair. I love it! I love how it looks and it really is ME! Who knows...maybe I'll do this for a while and change the color for holidays?????

Sunday, June 19th

2011-06-19T20:03:00.004-04:00

Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there!

It's been a good weekend - maybe even great.

Saturday, Mike, Phil and I went to Harper's Ferry, WV. It had been so long since I had been there and it's so close. I found some adorable coffee earrings and a charm for my Pandora Bracelet. We took lots of photos - here are a few.....
I've been playing around with creating stuff on canvas. I'm no Picasso, but I really enjoyed doing this canvas. It's hanging in my scrappy place, right above my computer monitor. It was such a relaxing work for me - and it makes me smile when I look at it. Maybe I should take it to work. I see me buying lots more paint soon.

I've also decided it's time to brush up on my photography skills. I miss my creative outlet and I love taking pictures. I'm going to start renting some different lenses from Borrowlenses.com so that I can decide on a new lens to purchase.

Sunday was church, a visit to the scrappy store to buy the last 3 Smash Journal's they had (two are for a friend!). But I love to journal and combining both journaling and scrappy goodness is such a wonderful treat for me!!!!!

Anyway....the weekend was great - A new work week looms on the horizon.

I wish you all a fabulous week!

TGIF....

2011-06-17T06:29:00.003-04:00

Seriously glad it's Friday! Need to be OUT of the office for a couple of days and enjoy some down time and time with family.

A little update on my diet....I'm hovering around a 10 pound weight loss! We have our nephew visiting for another week and then I'm back to the strict portion of the diet for a couple more weeks. Want to lose another 5 pounds before I head to Brave Girls Camp in July with my good friend Tigger.

Really going through a stressful time at work. I have never, in my career, had to deal with anything that so consumed my every thought from the moment I got up and then went to bed at night. Thankfully, I'm able to pretty much not think about it over the weekend, but by the time Friday rolls around, I am mentally drained. Probably more drained from trying to not strangle annoying people at work more than the actual issue! LOL.

Anyway....hurray...the weekend is here! I'll be taking lots of pics at Harper's Ferry this weekend -so I'll be posting some photos on Sunday.

Have a fabulous weekend everyone!

June 14, 2011

2011-06-14T08:20:00.002-04:00

Today as I was driving to work - there was traffic everywhere! For anyone who lives near a major metropolitan area - you know that work commutes can be somewhat frustrating and challenging.

Today I was hitting every alternate route I could think of and every route I tried I hit more traffic - and I stopped and thought - if I had not detoured from the original route, I probably would have already arrived at my destination.

And then I had one of those Gibb's Head Smack moments from God - If you don't try and detour from the original path you will get to the destination sooner and with less frustration. Sometimes a detour is not a shortcut at all - just saying.

Have a great day all!

June 12, 2011

2011-06-12T18:25:00.005-04:00

First....summer - I'm done with you. My grass is dead. You make my hair ugly - come on Fall.

"3 miles of vision for a 5,000 mile journey." My pastor Joel, said this morning in church and it sure does hit home on so many levels. I think that is truly what God does, He gives just what we need for the next step. To a person who likes everything planned in advance, FAR in advance, this is a challenging concept for me and one I struggle with often and probably always will. Thankfully, God has an abundance of patience, but I can truly envision Him sitting there, shaking his head at me - regularly. I'm going to incorporate that into the canvas I am working on right now.

I got a good sunset picture from our front porch. You can't even tell we live in a big subdivision.

Some pics of the barn swallows on our side porch. There are 6 of them and they barely fit in the nest anymore.

And today after church I took some pics of the Lugo Family. I've had the honor of taking their engagement, wedding, and maternity photos. Today, I got to take some pics of all three of them - Little Isabella Grace is precious!

Saturday - May 21st of South Beach

2011-05-21T08:34:00.002-04:00

Day 12 - I'm down 7 pounds! My clothes are fitting well again! It's always a good sign when clean jeans just go on and zip - no wiggling and sucking in the tummy to get them fastened!

I'm not having any problem with eating only Phase I foods - which is good. I thought it would actually be more difficult than it has been.

On Monday I am supposed to enter Phase II where you can add foods back in like fruit and some whole grains like bread and such - just nothing with white flour or potato's. However, I was put on a course of steroids for 12 days and one of those side affects is weight gain and a big appetite - Thank God that so far, those don't seem to be something happening to me - but I'm going to stay on Phase I until I'm done with the 'roids - just to be safe. It's been such a long time since I've seen success with any attempt to lose weight that I am very motivated right now!

As for the 'roids - I've been having chronic knee and hip pain which make it impossible for me to exercise regularly and the pain keeps me up at night. So I finally went to the dr. She told me my right knee was mushy - so I'm having an MRI on that next week. In an effort to treat any inflammation, she gave me roids and a muscle relaxer for 12 days - So far I see no improvement. The bloodwork for arthritis and lymes came back negative - so who knows what's going on in this aging body. The only side affect I seem to have from the meds is sleep - I missed several nights of good rest but I seem to be adjusting to that now as well.

My hubby had a car accident yesterday - so we are down a vehicle until we get his rental car. Don't know if they will total his truck or not. But nobody was hurt and I'm so thankful for that. Cars can be replaced.

Also, a good friend of mine, Jeanne, was diagnosed with breast cancer - it's early and I know she will beat this - she's an amazing woman with a fabulous family and a bunch of friends all over the world who will support her. So if you stumble across my blog - say a prayer for her and her family!

I'm getting ready to start my Saturday - have a fabulous day everyone!

Until next time...

So Far...So Good

2011-05-19T08:54:00.002-04:00

I'm down a total of 6 pounds now! Not really having any cravings or finding anything hard to resist. I'm in the zone and I'll make the most of it.

Had a dr. appt early this week and their scale had confirmed a 5 pound loss - so it's continuing to come off.

I'm on a course of prednisone and muscle relaxers and I am a little nervous the steroids will stall the weight loss or gasp even gain some back. But so far - no problems with the weight. I get an MRI on my knee next Wednesday - the dr said it's mushy and obviously that isn't good.

Other than that - things are okay - busy at work. Looking forward to the upcoming Memorial Day Weekend!

Have a great one!

Saturday - May 14th - Day 6 of South Beach

2011-05-14T09:24:00.003-04:00

Happy weekend! It's raining here in Virginia - and I think we will have rain for a few days. Glad we got the grass cut on Thursday evening.

So far, so good on the SB Diet (can't call it SBD - whole other meaning - lol) - My cravings for sweet things and carbs are definitely down - I'm not as anxious. During the week I think it's easier because there is routine - I'm hoping the weekends are not a struggle.

Ready for the number today? I'm down 4 pounds since Monday! I think I squealed a little on the scale this morning! One more week of Phase I and then we begin adding more foods back to our diet. I do miss fruit. I could SMELL the strawberries in the grocery store last night - they were calling my name. But I quickly steered the cart toward the squash and lettuce.

My favorite way to eat zucchini and yellow squash is to chop them in chunks, add sweet red pepper and onion, drizzle with olive oil and spices and roast them in the oven. I personally like them a little crispy on the edges - We eat them like that almost every night!

Wish me luck over the weekend - I'm hoping for another good report on weight loss.

Enjoy!

Day 3 - South Beach Diet

2011-05-11T21:10:00.000-04:00

So far so good!

I was down 2.2 pounds this morning! Today was really busy at work, so I didn't have much to think about nibbling - but I did have a "working lunch" and ordered a salad for myself and didn't have one of the cookies.

Breakfast is always yummy. I'm a fan of egg beaters - so I have that with some low fat cheese and canadian ham.

The string cheese is great for a quick snack during the day.

Since we both love the roasted veggies - we love having those every night. Tonight we had some steak on the grill.

And ending the day with a sugar free fudgesicle is great!

But the thing that got me through today was the quick results I have seen - so motivating!

Jocelyn - if you want to do South Beach with me - I'd love the company!!!!

Now I'm looking forward to getting on the scale in the morning!

South Beach Diet....

2011-05-10T20:15:00.002-04:00

Day 1. Went well. It wasn't overly difficult. Both of us survived, no dead bodies to report.

Both Mike and I are doing the diet - he didn't have much choice - LOL. But it will be good for us to both lose some weight.

The first few days of any new diet/fast is NOT fun. It's amazing how much I actually just pop random food in my mouth without even being hungry. That alone should shed a few pounds.

Day 2 - a little more challenging, but I stuck to my guns.

We both had scrambled egg beaters, canadian ham and a teeny sprinkle of low fat cheese for breakfast. For lunch I had a yummy tuna salad - which I whipped up this morning- very tasty. Snacks consisted of some low fat string cheese and low fat cottage cheese.

Admittedly, I was HUNGRY when I got home. But no grazing while cooking dinner.

For dinner we had roasted cauliflower, squash, and red peppers with a nice yummy grilled sirloin burger without the bun.

Tonight's snack - Sugar Free Fudgesicle - Yum.

I was doing okay - until I found my forgotten stash of Nutella - As I shut the cabinet door to cut off the line of sight, I think I shed a tear or perhaps it was some drool.....doesn't matter - I didn't cave.

92 Days

2011-04-21T06:22:00.002-04:00

92 Days....a little over 3 months....Until I turn 50.

This year has been full of many things: self discovery, self realizations, searching and finding, tears, joy, setting down, cleaning out the thought closet - you sure accumulate a lot of junk in there over a life time. I've read some amazing books lately, Soul Talk, Self Talk by Jennifer Rothschild - talks about how it makes a difference how we talk to ourselves - and you know - we are often times our own worst enemy. Another powerful book I read is "I'm Not Good Enough...and other lies women tell themselves" by Sharon Jaynes. Powerful books. Eye Opening books.

I've been journaling a lot these recent months and over the next 90 days, I'm going to share some things that nobody knows about me - that I've shared with only a select few people (ah...the lucky ones....NOT).

Here is one of my very favorite songs that really just speaks to me - I Will Not Be Moved - by Natalie Grant - Enjoy!

Post It Notes....

2011-02-22T21:19:00.003-05:00

Post It Notes are amazing and useful things! I love Post It Notes! I love bright colored ones the best! We get free stickies at work from different manufacturers. I use them all over my desk. I write myself notes about things that need to be done, things I need to remember, I use them to mark spots in documents or files or even books I'm reading. They are everywhere and I use them.

I also use them inside me. You know, we all have them. Those little emotional post it notes in our minds, hearts and spirits. Oh so handy for remembering who has made me mad or wronged me. Even better - the little reminders in my heart and spirit that constantly remind me how imperfect I am, remind me of all my fears and inadequacies! I can't tell you the countless times in my life I have walked through my soul and seen all the years of post it notes to remind me of bad decisions I've made, mean things I have done and how many times I've failed.

But I've had an epiphany of sorts. I don't think God uses post it notes. He doesn't keep track of all our garbage - we are the ones who do that. I think it's time to toss those old emotional post it notes in the trash and replace them (spoken like a post it note addict) with notes that remind me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made!

Hope everyone has a wonderful week!

January 30, 2011

2011-01-30T10:12:00.005-05:00

It's been an amazing couple of weeks. So much self re-discovery and shedding of a lot of emotional crap that I hadn't even realized had crept inside of me.

But even better than all the spiritual stuff going on inside of me - I was honored to be at the birth of Gwenyth Lee Leininger. Pam and Doug have invited me to be at the birth of each of their children and I am the photographer. Here are a few pics from Wednesday, January 26th when Miss Gwen made her entrance. After all the scares the doctors predicted, she is perfect and healthy.

I love you little Gwen!

Pam's Entourage - MeMaw Donna, Grandma Allen and Aunt Donna

We did it again honey!

Look out World...Here Comes another Brave Girl

CLOSED FOR RESTORATION

2011-01-17T06:23:00.003-05:00

It's been an awesome weekend. I spent all day Saturday working on projects for my Soul Restoration class. I am closed down for restoration, rest and repair. It's long overdue. Some areas of my life just need a good dusting, others require the room to be gutted and redone. I deserve this time.

One thing that has really been made evident to me is that I confuse being busy with being with being fulfilled and I've placed more emphasis on doing rather than doing with excellence. My to-do lists never got done. I was crabby that my lists didn't get done. What I did get done wasn't done well. I know I have a tendency to judge my husband when he sits and watches tv when there are "things" that need to be done - how can he possibly sit there while I do all this work? And truly, it wasn't something that needed to be done, it was more from the fact I thought he should be productive.

This weekend I began work on a project that represents my Soul House and it's eye opening. I haven't allowed myself time to recharge my batteries for so long and I enjoyed not filling my weekend with a list of "stuff" that I felt should be done. I did what was needed. Mike did what was needed. And I even made sure I stopped creating before dinner and we sat and watched a couple of movies together - with laundry sitting in the dryer.....the world didn't end.

I was going topost pics of my project pages so far, but I tweaked them after I took pics...so I need to take new pics. I'll get them up next weekend.

Have a great week everyone!

Soul Restoration Begins

2011-01-11T05:56:00.003-05:00

Today The Brave Girls Soul Restoration class begins! Over the weekend I began reading Ellen Miller's book that I mentioned below and found her amazing website! I don't for one second believe that my finding that book just before Soul Restoration class begins to be a coincidence. It was meant to happen that way. I have been reading Ellen's posts and doing her daily reading from her book and I have to tell you - it feels as if the woman has been receiving secret copies of my emails and those writings were directed to me and about me.

I am excited that Soul Restoration will allow me to creatively document the coming weeks - the combination of the the class and book I know is going to be exactly what the I have needed for so long to rebuild my spiritual and mental foundations.

I can already feel the difference - I feel lighter on the inside - almost as if there may be a little joy trying to break through the hard barrier I have allowed to be constructed inside of me.

And speaking of joy - I got to spend some time on Saturday with Joesette, Olivia and Lindsey - had a wonderful time! Here are Olivia and Lindsey with Mike - who they loved spending time with.

Work in Progress....

2011-01-09T21:06:00.003-05:00

A Work in Progress.

That’s what I am. That’s what we all are.

Works in Progress. I’m so glad that we have the opportunity to grow and change because being stagnant would be awful and boring.

My word for 2011 is Foundation. I picked that because I want to build a strong foundation in who I am – mentally, physically and spiritually. I can’t be a better me if my foundation is cracked and broken and weak.

For some time now I have felt restless, I’ve become hard and I’m tired. My spiritual foundation is dry – bone dry. On Friday I found myself wandering through Family Christian Bookstore looking for something to read that would be inspirational. I found a book called “The One Year Book of Inspirations for Girlfriends….Juggling Not-So-Perfect, Often-Crazy, but Gloriously REAL Lives”, by Ellen Miller (and she has a website – www.ellenmiller.com). The book caught my eye, probably because it has a purse on the front of it!

So this morning I get my coffee and I sit down with this book and I read the following (I’m just including some excerpts), “do you have uncommon joy? Do you live in a state of contentment that defies all logic in this world gone mad?......To live with rich contentment, joy – which cannot be affected by outside forces – is required. Joy is a state of heart and is the only one of these three states – happiness, peace, and joy – that you and you alone can control. No one can mess with your joy unless you let them.” She then went on to ask…”Have you maybe misplaced your joy? It’s not gone – it’s just in a very good hidey-hole.” Well – my joy can’t hide forever – I know you are there and Search and Rescue has been called out.

I’m tired and hard and restless because I’ve lost my joy. I don’t know the exact date it went missing – no “joy alert” went out…it just happened little by little. I miss feeling joyful on the inside – it’s like a river that keeps our soul hydrated.

So I’m working on the spiritual part of my foundation – and it’s something I need to do regularly – not just when I’m “thirsty”. That’s why the Brave Girls Soul Restoration has come at the perfect time for me – I want to create something to document the search and rescue of my joy.

And you know what else? For the first time in longer than I care to remember I am not dreading Monday morning. I’m looking forward to a new day, a new work week, class starting back up and an opportunity to keep creating the life I want.

Have an awesome week everyone!!

January 2, 2011

2011-01-02T22:53:00.003-05:00

Day 2 of 2011.

It was a good day.

I got up and enjoyed my amazing coffee. There is just something about the first cup of the morning that makes me warm and smile. Then I actually got out the wii fit and did the 20 minute run. It felt good. I had fun. I'm going to leave it out where I can see it so it's not so easy to ignore.

I also ordered the Today's Special Value off QVC from Saturday - the Ab roller - it looks like a fun machine and one that I could use a lot. Part of setting a healthy foundation is to find an exercise I enjoy and don't dread - so I will WANT to do it.

I watched a lot of QVC this weekend for some reason but I enjoyed it. I ordered some Mally Cosmetics - anxious to try her products.

I scrapped and had a wonderful time.

I had a massage at 2 pm and it was heavenly. then I picked up a few groceries and came home. That's where the massage buzz was disturbed by the smell of fish when I opened the door.

You see, my husband likes to eat canned salmon. I think it is the horrid smelling food sold - cat food is less offensive. So I discover he had put the juice in a bowl for the kitties....great salmon potpourri...I don't think so. I picked up the bowl, which was slick and I dropped it. I had glass and nasty fish juice all over the kitchen. My husband is lucky to be living at this point. So I get the mess cleaned up and then we notice our old cat critter is not breathing correctly. So with her being 16 we took her to the vet.....$400 later, she doesn't have anything clear cut wrong with her, but they gave her a puff of albuteral and that helped her breathing. She will follow up with her regular vet tomorrow. OH....but just as we left the house to go to the vet, we were a block away and she craps in the carrier - it about choked both of us so we did a u turn and did a quick clean out of the carrier.

We were there for about 3 hours and she seems fine now....except for coming in and trying to pee on the floor - but we caught her and she is in the dog crate. She is one vindictive animal.

So I've been thinking about my 2011 Word - and I'm leaning toward foundation. I want to restore my physical, mental and spiritual foundations - so that I am standing on solid ground - ready for anything this year has to throw at me and to make me - the best Donna I can be.

Happy soon to be Monday!!!!

January 1, 2011

2011-01-01T19:47:00.005-05:00

Happy New Year!

We had a wonderful Christmas and New Year!

I'm not making any grand resolutions this year - I just want to be consistent in doing things that are good for me and make me happy.

We spent Christmas Eve with the Allens/Leininger's. I just love Hannah and Charlie and I got the chance to spend some one on one time with Hannah and we had so much fun.

Here are a few pics:

On New Years Day I spent some time on the Launch Crop at Creative Soup and actually did two layouts.

Here are pics of the layouts and of the resulting carnage. I also managed to grab a quick picture of Daphne, my son's cat. She was my little buddy today. I'll miss her when they move out.

Brave Girls....

2010-12-15T06:09:00.001-05:00

Love my daily emails from the Brave Girls!

This mornings email....was really good. Thought I'd share.

Oh...and tonight is my last night of class for the semester!

Brave Girls...A Little Bird Told Me....

See...I Told You I'd Be Posting Soon

2010-12-14T08:28:00.003-05:00

I miss blogging. I miss reading blogs. Sometimes it sucks being mature and setting priorities that reduce or even eliminate some of my favorite hobbies. But school takes up a lot of time that used to be just for being scrappy or being on the internet. This is my last week of the semester and while I have enjoyed class, I'm glad to be done and have a break.

Thanksgiving was busy - didn't get ONE single picture. I have no photography mojo at the moment - so our big family gathering was not documented except in our memories.

The following weekend I went to NYC with my old friend Donna Fox and my lovely god daughter Kara. What a breathtaking place to visit during the holidays. NYC is larger than life and I had a hard time taking it all in. I will go back. We saw Mama Mia and the Rockettes - I am now hooked on shows!

My hubby was diagnosed with diabetes in mid November so we have been learning how to live with that and eat healthier. But he's doing great and is actually the model diabetic patient.

Hope you all are happy and healthy and enjoying this most joyous season!

I've included a few pics from NYC.....

yes....I'm still alive....

2010-12-08T13:01:00.001-05:00

Just busy with school and work.

I need to find time to do a big post - hoping for this weekend!

Hope everyone is doing well and that I get to catch up on my blog reading and posting!

Thank You Veterans

2010-11-11T09:01:00.002-05:00

My post this morning neglected to mention our Nation's Veterans and thank them for their service.

Thank you all - for your dedication, service and sacrifice.

Thank you to my 2nd Cousin Frank who never made it home from WWII.

Thank you to the rest of the service members from my family:
My mother, her brothers, my FIL, both my BIL's, My nephew and his wife, my niece, cousins and to all my friends who have served their Country with Honor

Thank you.

Thursday....Closer to the Weekend

2010-11-11T06:10:00.002-05:00

Thursdays are always like a little boost...the work week is more than half over and tomorrow is Friday. It also happens to be payday, which makes every other Friday that much better!

School is going well. I have an A in both English and Business. I got an A on my last business test and an A on my Business Plan presentation.

It's time to enroll for the next semester. After pondering for a while I've decided to stay with 2 courses over 3 courses. While I think I could handle 3 courses, I would have time for nothing else, specifically my creative side and that would not be good for me. I need that outlet. I'm also hoping to be able to take the PLACE course - which in a nutshell is making a portfolio of your life and work experience and if it passes the review, you can earn up to 15 credit hours - which would make a significant dent in my program requirements. I hope it's offered at this campus this semester and that I get accepted.

Earlier this week I was at the grocery store. There was a man with a little girl in front of me. He was paying for his purchases with WIC checks. He had several cans of kidney beans which apparently according to our government don't qualify as vegetables. I watched this man while the cashier loudly announced the beans were not eligible for WIC. She yelled across the store asking someone to check on the WIC allowability and I watched this man become ashamed. The cashier was rude and thoughtless. I pondered for the longest time telling her to put the beans on my bill - but I was undecided - afraid I would continue his humiliation. I tried my best to ignore his pain and not add to it so I didn't buy his beans. As he turned to leave, he turned to me and apologized for holding me up. I assured him it was no problem. I wish I had bought his beans for him, but he left so quickly I had no chance to catch up to him. So I took my well fed self back to my job and thought about this poor man. I know I would be embarrassed to use WIC checks. One thing I can do is call the store and tell the manager about the insensitivity shown this customer by the cashier. She had no right to treat him so rudely.

This year I'll be sure to give extra food to food drives. Maybe something I give will end up with this man and his family. Next time I'll buy those groceries for the person who needs help.

Have a great day all.

November is Well Under Way....

2010-11-08T06:14:00.002-05:00

And Thanksgiving will be here before we know it.

I had some girls come over and do some scrapping on Saturday - although lots more socializing got done I think. But I had fun.

School is busy. I'm enjoying it but it does take up one full weekend day. Registration opens for the new Semester this week. I'm going to meet with an adviser to see if the Life Experience Course is available. If I get accepted into this course, it will allow me to do a portfolio of my life and work history and possible be awarded credits toward my degree. I also want to take Algebra and get that over with! Decisions....decisions.

Work is going well. Some minor reorganizational changes are taking place, so I think that will be good and bring some new enthusiasm to the overall group.

We have family coming for Thanksgiving and our new dining room furniture has arrived so we will all have a place to sit.

Been doing lots more journaling lately - I find it is necessary for me. Gives me a safe place to moan and groan and whine and do little happy dances about little things and big things in my life.

Check out Journaling Saves - Kristin provides some good inspiration for where to get started.

Have a good week all!

A special shout out to my friend Jocelyn! Have a fabulous week sweet friend.

Final Day of Staycation....

2010-10-24T09:03:00.006-04:00

I can't believe it's here already. It's Sunday and my last day of Staycation. I am convinced I was born to be a full time shopper, scrapper and decorator. Some how....I ended up working for a govt contractor....egads....what a wild turn I took somewhere!

It's been a wonderful week off work. Didn't miss it - not one little bit. Not looking forward to going back. But the paycheck is nice. I'm definitely one of those people who work to live...not live to work. My personal satisfaction does not come from my job - in a job well done, yes, but not my job.

On Tuesday I drove down to Rocky Mount, NC to visit my dear friend Pat and her husband George. They were supposed to come up and see us, but alas, old age is settling in and it was easier for me to make a quick trip to see them. So glad to spend her birthday with her. Pat and I have been friends since 1981 - we've been through thick and thin - literally...many diets can prove it! LOL

Thursday I began the job of finishing the dining room painting and completed that task on Friday. I am very pleased with it. I like to paint. I found some red panels at Pier One on clearance and have hung those up. The carpet cleaner guy came on Saturday and cleaned the area rug. I know the new furniture has left the factory and there is a good possibility that it will be here next weekend! So excited.

Last Saturday, Mike and I had the pleasure of taking 60th anniversary pics of a beautiful couple - Mr. and Mrs. Lester, at their farm in Reliance, VA. Beautiful day and a beautiful couple.

I also got lots purged from my scrap room - and I can actually work in there effectively again.

Here are a few pics from my week.

Tomorrow....back to reality.

Staycation....Day 3

2010-10-18T20:31:00.005-04:00

It was a great Monday. How many times do we say we had a great Monday?

I've been reorganizing and purging in my scrap room...it needed it. I'm about 3/4 of the way done. Lots of stuff is going and lots of stuff being reorganized.

I went to Ross's today and found some great journals for only $5.99 each. Picked up three of them. Then I found a great book on altered books - only $2.99...the two sweaters that I some how ended up with, while a bargain, they weren't $2.99 bargains.

While shopping for Pat's birthday present I some how ended up with two pair of Brighton earrings for myself. Oops...funny how that happens sometimes.

I fixed a yummy dinner tonight - you can find the recipe on Food Netwook - it's Ina Garten's Perfect Roast Chicken and it IS perfect and yummy. I leave out the fennel and add potato's. Oh talk about delish! Then I made Giada's Espresso Brownies which are always a hit.

Tomorrow I am driving to Rocky Mount, NC to visit my dear friend Pat for her birthday. I'll be spending the night and heading back home Wednesday morning.

Thursday is the day I've set aside to finish painting the dining room.

So for a Monday....I'd say it was a pretty good day.

Staycation...Day 2

2010-10-17T20:58:00.007-04:00

Today I got blue fingers....that means it was a good day! I've been puttering my my scrap room. Did a few things - made a big mess, which now needs to be cleaned up so I can make more mess!

I love to journal. I love paper. I love pens. I love to write and doodle. In fact, my mom used to say there was not a safe piece of paper in the house when I was little. I guess that still holds true today. I've been doing a lot of reading about journaling and I'm branching out to do some layouts that really are more of a journal page. Here is one I did today on the word SHOULD.

Here is a birthday card I made for a friend that I am going to go see on Tuesday. Since I've become a Unity Stamp addict, I'm branching out in making cards. However, there aren't any stamps on this card. I was inspired by a card I saw on a Prima Flowers FB post. Thanks to Kari for a great card!

Another thing I did today was the Helmar Glue Blog Hop. If you have not tried Helmar Glue products...omg...YOU MUST! Helmar 450 is one amazing glue! Everything I have tried of theirs is just amazing! They have a glue or adhesive for everything. Here is a link...you can win some prizes if you complete the blog hop! Also, be sure to like them on FB! http://www.helmarusa.typepad.com/!

And even better...I don't have to get up and go to work tomorrow. I am one happy girl this Sunday evening!

Dear Diary....

2010-10-16T11:41:00.006-04:00

It's Saturday, October 16th....

The weather is stunning....it's a crisp, sunny day with a brisk breeze. The leaves are turning here - it's my most favorite time of the year!

Last night I got home from work and I puttered and did some laundry and things...I was so happy to just be home. I love being home. I have lots of things I want to get done and lots of things I want to do this week. But I'm not going to schedule myself into a frenzy...this is after all...staycation.

I've recently discovered a great website about journaling....It's called Journaling Saves and I've come to really enjoy it. I've even emailed with the owner, Kristin a few times. She's delightful.

A recent journaling tip I got from here had to do with what do I need to give myself permission to do? She had several items listed - Self Care, Time to Journal, Money to buy new paints, an hour alone.... Since I don't have small children at home anymore, finding time for self care is not a big issue for me, money for my crafts - again, not an issue - an hour alone - still...not an issue

.

My thing...Journaling. I remember as a little girl my mother saying there was not a safe piece of paper in our home - I would doodle and write on anything and everything (I don't remember drawing on walls or anything I wasn't supposed to, but who knows?). To this day, I buy books for journaling because I love them. I love how they look, I love how it feels to sit and write and write and lately, even be artistic in my journals - but that takes lots more time. The thing I don't make time for is journaling. For me, having everything done is a requirement before I sit down, curl up, grab my journal and write. Yet journaling is an important part of me. I yell and scream, laugh and cry, express my fears and self doubts, I talk to myself, I talk to God, it's my safe place to put all my ugliness and anger and yet to put my hopes and dreams in writing. It's not something I would ever want someone else to read - it's for me and me only.

I do pretty well at journaling in the early morning with my first cup of coffee, but that time is very finite because I have to get ready for work. In the evenings by the time I sit down, I just don't feel like writing.

So I think I will give myself permission to journal in the evenings - before the chores are done - I think I deserve it and it makes me a better person, a more pleasant person - and you know the saying....If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. That's very true in my house.

Let the Journaling begin!

Thankful....

2010-10-14T06:10:00.002-04:00

Living in the Washington DC area, at some point, you will have to deal with rush hour traffic and gridlock.

Since late 2006 I have had the pleasure and benefit of working 7 miles from home. I never even have to get on an interstate highway. I am blessed. I appreciate that. It makes life so much more pleasant.

Yesterday I got a reminder of how bad traffic can be. I needed to travel to Beltsville, Maryland from Gainesville, VA. My projected arrival time was sometime around 8:15 to 8:30. Being a former commuter, I smartly allowed 2 hours and left my house at 6:15. Good Googlie Mooglie....there was an accident at the Rest Stop on I66. It shut the road down for over an hour, allowing on lane to pass. Talk about a mess. Every possible artery heading north was at a crawl. There was nothing to do but endure. I had to make a pit stop at the office to make my bladder gladder and got back on the road.

The time to go 50 miles.

3 hours.

I got to the meeting 15 minutes late. Not a huge deal. I called ahead, but still....insanity.

Made me REALLY appreciate my commute. I don't know how I commuted all those years. Life is too short and most people just accept it as a fact of life. To me, this thief of quality of life is almost important as our national economy and jobs - BUILD SOME ROADS PEOPLE! PUT IN MORE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION. HAVE COMPANIES NEVER HEARD OF TELECOMMUTING?

Don't even try to say to me if we build more roads they will build more houses. They are going to build more houses regardless. Build the roads to get us to work - the people are HERE...look around you as you sit and creep along in traffic, every single day of the week. That is YOUR time ticking away...your life being wasted doing nothing but sitting in your car. It's bad for people, it wastes gas and it's bad for the environment.

Quit spending my tax dollars on ridiculous things and improve the infrastructure and peoples lives and hey....just think, you'd be putting some people to work.

Gee....how smart would that be?

Loving October....

2010-10-10T13:53:00.005-04:00

Fall is definitely in the air....my pumpkin candles are burning. leaves are turning, the nights are cool and relaxing, the days are getting shorter...I'm loving this weather.

This weekend I took the time to get a little creative at the loss of doing more housework. I just needed to create. I've recently become addicted to Unity Stamps...thanks to my friend Lisa and Brave Girls, I have a good collection started already. My friend, Cathy, makes beautiful cards and she got me hooked, so I ordered a Spellbinder's Wizard, embossing and die cut machine and now I'm hooked on that as well. This is my first card using some new Unity Stamps and my Wizard.

Since we are having lots of family for Thanksgiving, it was time to replace the dining room furniture I sold a little over a year ago. Heck, it may even be closer to two years now....time flies. Anyway, I digress. BHKB and I have been looking at various furniture places in the area and on Craig's List. We had a budget in mind. We had what we "wanted" in mind. Funny how things happen - the budget was exceeded and we ordered something we hadn't considered. After having a very formal and dark dining room; I really thought we'd be getting another dark colored set. WRONG!

We were on our way to Regency Furniture and decided to go back into Powell's Furniture in Fredericksburg because we heard they were having a sale. There were a couple of sets we liked and thought we'd see if the prices were better.

Well, we ended up ordering a medium oak, mission styled oak set by Pennsylvania House. Totally NOT what I had planned on and then I thought - we never used the other dining room furniture - only for holidays. I wanted inviting. I want a place for friends and family to gather. I want a room that we love. So THIS is what we got. I just go the table and chairs. I am not into matchy, matchy so I am going to look for a unique sideboard piece to go in that room.

It's almost the end of the weekend....and I find myself a little melancholy on Sunday evenings.

Next weekend we are taking some anniversary pics of a couple married 60 years!

Hope you all have a great week!

Things That Make Me Go Hmmmmmm

2010-10-05T06:18:00.002-04:00

Sometimes when I'm driving around or wide awake at some ridiculous time of the night, things I think of make me go hmmmm....So, I thought I'd share some of those random thoughts.

1. When driving past the hospital or a doctor's office and I see people outside smoking. It just strikes me wrong. Haven't these people seen the dangers of smoking up close and personal? And why is it even allowed on hospital grounds?

2. Why cats feel the need to puke on carpet? Tile is so much easier to clean. Maybe my cats will read this blog.

3. I think I'll actually be glad for this time change - I don't like waking up when it's dark outside. I'm a morning person.

4. Why do people come to school without pencil, paper, book or the scantron test form?

5. People who text in class are rude. Life will not end if you can't communicate with the world for 2 hours? If I was the instructor, I would tell them to leave and mark them down for an absence. I'm betting that would fail a lot of people, quickly.

Share some of your random thoughts with me.

Woohoo! Fall is Here!

2010-10-03T16:30:00.005-04:00

I'm so happy Fall has arrived! I have been longing for cooler weather for what feels like forever! And look...my flowers are coming back. They are happy to see Summer gone too.

September is over and with it the insanity of the Federal Fiscal Buying Frenzy, which I detest beyond description.

October is here. The weather is cooler - even a little crisp the past two mornings. I am one happy girl!

We have had a fabulous weekend. Yesterday we went to the Manassas Fall Festival and enjoyed a whoopie pie and then we headed to Fredericksburg to continue the hunt for new dining room furniture. We've been looking the past three weekends and I think we finally found something that both of us like the looks of and the price! Since we were in Fredericksburg I had to fit in a visit to Scrapdoodles, a really great scrapbooking store. The hubby was good enough to drop me off there and let me go look around for a bit. On the way home we stopped at a roadside BBQ place and got some out of this world ribs! Their cold slow was also amazing. I am thinking about asking them to fix a beef brisket for Thanksgiving for us. We both agreed we would go all the way back to Fredericksburg to get their food! If you are driving along Rt. 3 near Plank Road - look for McCoy's BBQ on the side of the road - the people are so nice and the food is amazing. You won't be disappointed.

Sunday has been a day of chores and homework. I'm thoroughly enjoying school and I'm even happier now that busy season at work is over and I feel like I can devote 100% to school now. I've squeezed in a little creative time, but not much as my mid-term portfolio for English takes priority. I'm learning so much about writing and most importantly that drafts and revisions are a good thing...that a good paper or even good blog post is not something that happens on the first try.

Fall makes me feel rejuvenated. I just want to do more, be outside, take photos, I sleep better. It's just my very favorite time of year.

I have not been able to get to much fall decorating yet, but I'll work on that more this weekend.

I was able to get my fall door decoration up and I took a couple of pics outside. The tree in the front is already turning and it's just beautiful.

I hope you all have a fabulous week!

I'll Be Back....

2010-09-28T06:26:00.002-04:00

Just as soon as September is over....I promise.

Between the Federal fiscal year end and school, I don't have as much internet time....but things will slow back down on October first.

But don't you worry your pretty little heads! The Federal Government is hard at work spending your hard earned tax dollars on lots of stuff they don't really need! And with lots of Government contractors out there - there are plenty of companies helping them! Yeah...this is why I need a new career, I'm a little jaded! LOL

Have a super week blog friends!

September Rambling....

2010-09-19T17:20:00.006-04:00

As an employee of a government contractor that sells to the Federal Government, to say September is busy is an understatement. 70% of my companies annual revenue is done in July, August and September. While most people are enjoying the summer, the Federal Government is gearing up for a purchasing frenzy that will come to a conclusion on September 30th. Hope you paid those taxes so the money can be spent with abandon!

This year is a little different for me in that I am also a college student. I wisely took only two classes this semester. I know that I have a tendency to get stressed out when my "to-do" list hits what is "critical mass" to me. First and foremost, I am loving school. I'm sure I won't love all my classes, but for now, I'm enjoying the classroom. I got my first grade, in English, an A. I was downright giddy.

Earlier this month I got to go to Wisconsin and scrap with a bunch of freakie women from Scrap Freak. Because it was September, I did not expect to get my days off approved, but I did, so I went. Getting off in September is NOT easy in my line of work.

I had a fabulous time! Simply fabulous. The ladies I spent time with were amazing. Cathy who picked me up at the airport and was my roommate was so much fun. We had been communicating for months via email and it was no surprise to me that we clicked even better in person! We had the best time. There was a LOT of laughing in this group....and lots of creating!

Cathy and I

I didn't take very many pictures so I'm lifting a few from Scrap Freak - I am going to do a mini album of this trip....I want to do a page on everyone that was there. I hope I get to go next year.

The Gang

The crop organizer, Tamara, organizes this crop from Germany. She did a FANTABULOUS job! She also brought us all lots of yummy German treats.

Tam and I

There is just too much to capture in a single blog post...you just had to be there!

And just a little FYI - 9 more business days until September 30th....

Have a super week everyone!

September 7th...

2010-09-07T05:57:00.005-04:00

It's back to school day here in Prince William County....summer traffic comes to an end. But that means that Fall truly is around the corner. The weather was a lovely sneak peek this weekend - truly beautiful!

Had a wonderful weekend. Didn't do a lot. Studied and homework. The husband and son and I played Wii on Sunday night - had a blast! Reminder to myself - wear the wrist band! My remote took a leap from my hand, but it hit the wall and not the TV thankfully.

Went to Lindsey's 5th birthday party. She is such a sweet girl. I need to finish converting pics that I took but here are a couple of shots.

I leave for Wisconsin tomorrow to go to a crop with the Scrapfreaks. I had to get special permission to be off those days since it is our busy season. I'll have my computer so I will be doing some work. I'm even more motivated to get my degree and get away from anything to do with the federal fiscal year end. For lack of a better description it's like Black Friday and the 3 days before Christmas, all rolled into one long month.

Have a great week all!

Brave Girls-----

2010-09-02T06:07:00.002-04:00

I'm so excited! I started my day with a cup of coffee and some tears. But this is good, and my coffee was yummy!

Many of you have heard me talking about Brave Girls and Brave Girls Camp in July 2011! Well - they have finally got their new site and blog up. You NEED to go and check it out!

Melody Ross and her sister do an amazing job of send out the Daily Truth emails...they are so relevant and uplifting in a world that is more geared toward tearing us down. Please sign up for them!

Here is a link to their new blog!

BRAVE GIRLS!

August 31st...

2010-08-31T06:44:00.003-04:00

EEK....where has the year gone?

I haven't done much creating lately, but since my time on the DT for Sketches by Tamara has ended (which I enjoyed so much), I can post some of my creations here now!

The top layout is from sweet Hannah's 2nd birthday party. What a trooper her dad was to dress up as the DJ from YoGabba Gabba.

This one is a layout about the shopping I did in Orlando!

Layout about our trip to Bubba Gump Shrimp - some of the best seafood I've ever eaten!

Fall is in the Air.....

2010-08-29T08:47:00.007-04:00

Vibrant orange, red and yellow; the intoxicating aroma of cinnamon and spiced pumpkin fill the air. It's getting close to my very favorite time of the year - Fall! Everyone who knows me - KNOWS I love Fall. I mean who doesn't really? If you put out of your mind what follows Fall - it's truly a beautiful time of the year.

The smell of anything pumpkin just makes me happy! After all these years, Spiced Pumpkin by Yankee Candle, remains my favorite candle scent of all time. In fact, I already have some of these yummy smelling candles out! I can't wait to pull out the fall decorations....I'm just trying to figure out how early is too early!

Isn't this a beautiful location? I would love to be able to spend fall in such a spectacular setting. A girl can always dream! Naturally, I would be out of there before the snow began to fly!

Last year I found some unique pumpkins and bought several for decoration. This year I want to paint some pumpkins white. Pumpkins are so versatile!

I completed my first week of class. I was anxious and uncertain of what to expect in class, but after class I found myself wired and excited. I truly enjoyed both English Composition and Intro to Business and both Professor's are very different. I am not quite sure what I was so anxious about now, but I am looking forward to doing homework and learning and continuing this path that will help me create the life I want.

Have a great week all!

August 24th...

2010-08-24T05:42:00.003-04:00

EEK! My first night of class. I'm excited. I'm scared. Part of me just wants to come home and "forget" to go tonight. It's our busy season at work and I'm already feeling anxious about how to handle everything for the next 6 weeks. Class goes from 7 to 9:40 pm. For me, I'm generally asleep by 9:30 so being out that late, two nights in a row, is going to be a BIG adjustment for me. But I CAN do this. Keeping organized is key and realizing that there may be times when I can't get the dishes in the dish washer or clean a bathroom when I want it done. The world will not come to a screeching halt if that happens.

I spent last weekend with no plans and had a wonderful time. No plans for a "task" is not like me, but I actually enjoyed it. Not sure if I could ever get to the point where I do nothing on a weekend, but this was close.

Saturday morning I went to:
DSW - got two new pair of shoes for the fall
Pier 1 - Added to my dish collection - fell in LOVE with these dishes...aren't they beautiful and they match my kitchen wonderfully.
Kirklands - just kind of walked around and perused
Yankee Candle for some tealights in my favorite scent - Spice Pumpkin
Then I managed to get an appointment at a local spa for a Lavender Pedicure. OMG....pure heaven.

Walking around and seeing all the fall decorations makes me long for fall. I love this change of season coming up - the colors, the first crisp fall morning....it's a beautiful time of year and it makes me feel wonderful. I'm so done with this hot and nasty summer - go away summer - I'm done with you!

I have lots of things I want to share, but it's time to get ready for work.

She Said Yes!

2010-08-23T05:51:00.002-04:00

Rick proposed to Chelsea on Saturday evening, on top of the Empire State Building. They went to NY for her birthday!

I am beyond thrilled for them and for our families!

School starts for me on Tuesday! I have butterflies in my stomach - from nerves and excitement I guess!

Here is a pic of Rick and Chelsea!

2010-08-07T09:22:00.005-04:00

Some days life has a way of putting things back into perspective and even humbling you.

This week I have had a couple of people tell me how proud they are of me for going to school and that I am inspiration to them. I could only dream of inspiring others - I'm just me...finding my way along in life, often it feels like it's dark and I don't know where the edge is...so I tiptoe along...inch by inch.

But this week I read a story that really touched me and heard about the most heartbreaking story of Ryan and Chad Arnold.

The love and ultimate sacrifice that Ryan gave for his brother Chad is just beyond my pitiful attempts at coming up with the appropriate words. Please go read their story. I pray for peace for Ryan and Chad's families during this time of loss and ironically, joy at the new life given to Chad.

My blog friend Jocelyn has been struggling with health issues for some time...yet she always finds time to post some of the most encouraging entries on her blog. She inspires me. Her joy, even in times of testing, is always evident. If you ever want to read something uplifting or see some beautiful and artistic creations - check out Jocelyn's blog....

While I stumble around, working at creating a life I want - I was incredibly humbled by the story of Chad and Ryan and find encouragement from my friend Jocelyn.

Overall...it's been a wonderful weekend and I have good stuff to share later this week.

Have a fabulous week all!

Blogging Fool Here....

2010-08-04T20:29:00.004-04:00

Well...at least for me...it's a good place for me to ramble.

I set my blog to be able to moderate all the comments...this gets rid of the annoying chinese posts. It gives me great pleasure to REJECT those posts. I have to wonder if they KNOW I reject them? That would make it all the sweeter.

I've gotten so excited about school starting on August 23rd - although my first day isn't until August 24th. When I first started considering this endeavor, I was NOT looking forward to the whole school thing. I was apprehensive, unsure, and concerned with being overwhelmed and to a point, I still am. I know there will be days I am stressed between the duties of work and school and days that the negative person inside of me, will undoubtedly chime in with self doubt and loathing for even thinking I could pull this off successfully, however, the anticipation of the journey and most of all, the finish, has me totally filled with excitement.

The last time I attended college:
- My son was not born yet
- Our TV did not have a remote control
- We had ONE TV in the house (we have 5 right now)
- BOTH of our phones had cords and the Trimline phone was considered "stylish" and small!
- My refrigerator was avocado green, my counter tops were white laminate with some flecks of something, and MTV was not even on the air
- We still played vinyl albums

Things have changed.
I have changed.
I am changing.

Can I DO this?

You bet I can!

Well....It's Official

2010-08-02T20:24:00.002-04:00

I am enrolled at NOVA. A real student.

Bit the bullet....took a deep breath and took the dreaded math placement test. Not quite as ugly as I expected....I will have to take Algebra before I can take Liberal Arts Math - but I can live with that.

To start out at what I hope is a reasonable pace, I'm taking English Comp and Intro to Business. Both in class courses. I figure it will be good for me and help me to get back in the school groove again.

I'm going to buy books tomorrow!

I get to go back to school shopping...for ME!

I'm excited!

Now when September 25th hits and I'm whining and crying about work and school being a pain in my butt - remind me that the Federal Fiscal Year ends on September 30th and life will resume it's normal frenzied pace!

It's here....again....

2010-08-01T20:44:00.006-04:00

Sunday evening...the end of the weekend.

I love when I have a productive weekend. Love when I don't have to get up to the alarm clock...have time to meander through the day at my pace and do what I want when I want.

Next week I'll be taking my math placement test and completing my registration for school. I'm getting excited! I've already done the English placement test.

While it may not sound glamorous....I did a lot of cleaning and getting rid of stuff again this weekend. Got some stuff to the dump....fixed a big breakfast for my men this morning.
In my family room I have 4 big windows...two are in a corner. I have struggled for years to figure out what to do with these windows besides blinds. I love the brightness of this room but it needed "something". This morning while puttering around in the kitchen - it hit me - Hang the curtains in the corner and swag the curtains toward the corner.
So I "forced" myself to go to Pier 1 and get some curtain panels. I know...it was a struggle. It was torture. Walking through the store perusing all the stock in Pier 1. I guess someone needs to do things like that! LOL. Here's a before and after pic - Keep in mind - this corner is dedicated to my cats and we converted the dog crate to a cat perch and our old Kitty Critter sometimes has to be confined to the crate when she is having a bad day due to her hyperactive thyroid condition- so while I would LOVE to have a comfy chair in this corner - the kitties come first - at least the sick kitty does. I'd also love to get rid of the "Tower of Technology" that my husband insists must stay....he has an odd love of large speakers - I'm trying to convince him that bigger isn't always better....but it's a battle I'll never win! Next house will have a sound proof theater room...just for him! LOL

I managed to get a pic of my son's cat Daphne. She is a challenge to capture with the camera - she doesn't sit still long enough for me to get my camera out. Today I got lucky. I bought her a new scratching post and she's been enjoying it all day.

TGIF

2010-07-30T07:08:00.002-04:00

Ahhhh.....a nice, cool morning - free of heat and humidity!

I'm glad this work week is almost over. It's been one of "those" kind of weeks.

I'm looking forward to a weekend that I have "NOTHING" planned - other than the routine chores. I am looking forward to setting my own pace this weekend. Not that I won't accomplish a lot, but it will be on my schedule!

The Brave Girls have been posting some amazing and encouraging words this week - they always do, but this weeks emails have been especially timely and uplifting for me. Please, please, check them out! In less than a year - I get to attend Brave Girls Camp with a group of Brave and Awesome women! Here is yesterday's Brave Girl's Email!

I'm SO Thankful

2010-07-27T07:20:00.001-04:00

That I don't have PEPCO for my power company!

Some people in Maryland have been without power for days and it will be several more days before it's restored.

I'm thankful that I have Dominion Virginia Power and I have to say....we rarely lose power during storms.

I feel for those people who are losing food, have no AC in this heat and just the impact on daily life.

50...Here I come....

2010-07-25T18:39:00.004-04:00

Full Speed Ahead....50 is on the horizon! BRING IT ON!

I'm not afraid. I'm not sad. I'm excited.

Excited about what my future holds.

Excited about the life I am going to CREATE!

But first...a little about my fantastic birthday!

It was the best birthday I can remember having in years. I used to hate my birthday. HATE it....and that is a story for another time! My day was so wonderful...I just wanted to share it with you all.

First...I got up to flowers by the coffee pot from my sweet son! Coffee and flowers...what a great way to start the day! Then he gave me a Pandora bracelet that was gift from him and his totally awesome girlfriend, Chelsea. It had a butterfly charm and a coffee cup charm on it. I will treasure it always.

As is the tradition at our office....especially for those known to pull practical jokes on others....your cubicle gets trashed. Let's just say, they could win an award with what they did to my cubicle! And a coworker was hiding underneath all that shredding and jumped out out me...I screamed! It was totally awesome!

I got the Pioneer Woman Cookbook and a pkg of Depends from Tanya and Tanya. I wonder if the Depends are a peek into my future? LOL

My boss got me a bag of fun office goodies...a bell with bling (how appropriate!), some fun folders, wine, notes that say "Queen of the Salon"....I also got various gift cards from friends.

Peepers got me a birthday card that screamed...Brave Girls!

My hubby got me a Nook, which I'm already using lots.

We had dinner at a local restaurant - Pizza Margarita.

It was a perfect day, shared with good friends and family.

And here I am...in all my 49 year old glory on the way to work.

It's My Birthday!

2010-07-22T07:12:00.002-04:00

I'm 49 Today!

I'm happy it's my birthday! I'm excited about what the day holds for me!

That statement in itself....shows a big change in me.

Stay tuned....I'm gonna commemorate this day - because next year this time...you won't even recognize the amazing 50 year old woman that will be here!

I'm ready for this new start.

This "re-birth".

I'm ready to CREATE my life!

Yes, It's Been A While....

2010-07-09T12:32:00.002-04:00

Since I updated my blog! I do see that I have some lovely person who posts in chinese to my blog....gee thanks for all those "wonderful" comments - NOT.

All is well, just busy with work and puttering around the house getting some "chores" and things done before I totally throw my life into upheaval when school starts! While I "know" my decision to go back to school is the right course for me right now...it's still really scary to me at times. I wonder things like -

Can I even learn anymore? Seriously, I feel like my brain has no more room to absorb anything some days. I can't tell you what I had for lunch 2 days ago!
HOW do you study? I haven't "studied" in years - a skill I will have to re-learn (see...back to the learning thing again).
Am I going to overwhelm myself? Will I fail completely?
Am I just too old to consider making such a big change - like career? Seriously....I'll be 49 in 13 days. I obviously won't be carrying a full course load - so who knows how old I'll be when I actually graduate!

And what is with this heat wave? Go away already! Hot, humid weather makes me crabby and it makes my hair ugly and anyone who knows me...knows - it's all about my hair! This weather is actually making me long for that 4 letter word that starts with S and ends with W. I have no use for this weather and it's killed my grass and my poor flowers - they are so pitiful right now!

I've done a little scrapping over recent weeks...not a lot though. Haven't had too much mojo.

I also find it a challenge to keep a positive attitude going - it is so easy to get sucked into "stinking thinking". It really does require daily care and feeding to keep a positive attitude going. I think I find the challenge hardest at work. There are so many negative attitudes and no matter how much you try and avoid the chatter....you hear it...people seek others out to share bad news and gossip. Attitude is contagious....sometimes I think bad attitudes are more contagious or maybe people think it's more interesting.

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Some End of the Week Rambling....

2010-06-20T19:23:00.004-04:00

Maybe it's just me, but Sunday afternoons go way too fast and before I know it....it will be 5:30 Monday morning.

- I discovered Perrier this weekend....and I've been drinking it all weekend. For some reason I find it very refreshing.
- Grilled pineapple....yum, yum, yum
- Deadliest Catch...the episode where Capt Phil has his stroke is coming on this Tuesday evening...for me...as well as many fans, I'm sure it will be emotional to watch. Love that show and Capt Phil was my favorite. Seeing him on the show this season makes it feel like is still here.
- NCIS marathons are good for vegging on a Sunday afternoons.
- Recovering from round 2 with bronchitis/pneumonia. This snuck up on me and I'm full of antibiotics, steroids and prescription cough medicine. To say the least...my mind has been a little foggy.
- Brave Girls....I know I've posted about them before, but seriously, I love their daily emails. They speak to a part of me that very few know how to tap into....I am always encouraged by their words. I am so excited about my trip to Brave Girls Camp in July 2011. Here is a recent email:

Have a great week all!

Donna

Sketches By Tamara - It's A Recipe Challenge

2010-06-10T06:25:00.003-04:00

This week it's a recipe challenge over at Sketches by Tamara.

Go check it out!

I want to see what you create!!! Link it back here!

Have a great day!

Thank You to Each of My Extreme Encouragers....

2010-06-02T05:39:00.002-04:00

Christine Kane is another one of the motivational writers that has really been helping me over recent months. Here is a recent article of hers....and also....thank you to each of the extreme encouragers in my life....I love you all. I hope I can be an extreme encourager to someone!

How to Be an Extreme Encourager
by Christine Kane

Many years ago, when I first shared my dream of being a songwriter with one of my best friends, she knitted her brows and said, "Huh?"

I can't say I was deflated by all of the warnings that followed. After all, I had always been surrounded by this kind of "practical thinking." In fact, I probably shared my dream with her just so she'd talk me out of it.

During this fumbling stumbling time in my life, I met a man who became an unlikely best friend and mentor. He was a brilliant jazz musician, and he could do pretty much anything on the computer.

One night, after he performed at a local jazz club, we were walking towards my car. I told him my dream of being a songwriter. Without even blinking, he said, "Honey (he always called me Honey), you'd be a fabulous songwriter. That's perfect!" And he meant it.

At that moment, I felt like I was falling into a soft clean bed. I had never experienced such direct and truthful encouragement without a single "practical" warning attached to it. This friend set me free by offering one simple thing:

Encouragement.

Fast forward many years and successes and failures later. I'm surrounded by encouragers. I'm sure there are doubters around. But they just don't register anymore.

Also, I have become an Extreme Encourager myself.

I've observed Extreme Encouragers. I've also recognized some traits that they all have in common. See if you recognize any of these traits in yourself:

• An Extreme Encourager lives by example.

The best encouragers are the ones who live it. Whether they're just getting started, or they're veteran risk-taking creativity-living wild-women - the encouragers are the ones who want a bigger life for themselves and are willing to "go there." This is why my jazz musician friend could simply offer encouragement when my other friend could not.

• An Extreme Encourager actively listens.

Encouragers know that encouragement doesn't mean you just tell people to "buck up" or "get over it." They know how to listen. This means looking at the speaker, listening to her, setting your agendas and judgments aside, and honoring the speaker as a wise soul.

• An Extreme Encourager avoids clichés.

Avoiding clichés is a natural result of actively listening to someone. Being an extreme encourager doesn't mean that you blindly tell people "You can do it!" or "Let go of fear!" It's deeper than that. It's seeing the truth of the other person, especially when they cannot.

• An Extreme Encourager acknowledges the hooglie-booglies, but doesn't focus on them.

We all have the hooglie-booglies. These are the voices that tell us we can't, or we shouldn't, or we'll fail, or we'll look stupid. An encourager doesn't focus on those voices because she knows they they're trying to hook her. An encourager simply acknowledges that the voices are there and that you can't make them go away by arguing with them. An encourager knows that those voices aren't the truth. They only SEEM like the truth.

• An Extreme Encourager remembers that no one knows what's best for anyone else.

An encourager knows that we are all wise - and that sometimes we make choices that might not seem so wise. An extreme encourager calls out our deepest desires and then helps us see the thoughts and fears that hold us back.

• An Extreme Encourager accepts miracles, grace and mystery as the deeper truth.

Extreme encouragers are often mystics of sorts. They know that the so-called "woo-woo" stuff is more real than the so-called "logical" stuff. They celebrate the divine as a simple fact of everyday existence and don't get caught up in the "prove it" mindset.

• An Extreme Encourager knows that you can develop the needed character traits as you go.

In other words, she knows you're ready now, even if you're not perfect yet! I shudder when I read advice that discourages people from trying something because of character traits "required" in advance. "You shouldn't blog if you're not disciplined." "If you don't have focus, you can't be a writer." Most of the successful people I know developed these traits as they went. I certainly did. Encouragers understand the huge potential for growth in each human, especially when someone takes the biggest risk of all - and begins to follow her heart.

Christine Kane is the Mentor to Women Who are Changing the World. She helps women uplevel their lives, their businesses and their success. Her weekly LiveCreative eZine goes out to over 12,000 subscribers. If you are ready to take your life and your world to the next level, you can sign up for a F.R.E.E. subscription at http://christinekane.com.

June 1st - Already???/

2010-06-01T05:43:00.007-04:00

Wow....we are so close to be half way done with this year...Time does fly!

I've been exercising regularly again - feels good. Even got new running shoes on Friday and boy what a difference. My body still protests loudly with achy joints after wards but I keep going. One thing that is frustrating is that cardiovascular wise - I could run the entire 3 miles, but my joints just won't allow it - I really do hurt - so I end up walking more than jogging.

Had a wonderfully relaxing weekend and it was needed. I love waking up to no alarm clock and just being able to lay in bed and enjoy a slow start to the day. I wake up at my normal alarm clock time of 5:30, but I don't have to hop out of bed and start doing anything. I love my bed, my sheets, my blanket. I also did not think about work...I don't think one time did the office even cross my mind.

On Memorial Day, I thought about my family members who have served this great country in the past and the current family members who are members of our military. Those families give a lot to this country and I feel we don't do enough for them. When I think of all the govt programs being instituted for those who don't want to work and earn what they are given and to think that we ask our brave men and women to leave their families and serve in war time with some paying the ultimate price - well it just infuriates me. I better stop or this will turn into a big political post and I try to stay away from that.

I'm really struggling with my weight. It's not coming off like I want it to - so the obvious cause is that I must still be eating too much. This week I will log everything I eat in the hopes that I will see where I am going off track. I have a good idea that I'm still doing too much grazing or mindless eating. And maybe I need to concede that as you get older it's a little more difficult to drop the unwanted pounds.

We went the Delaplane Strawberry Festival on Saturday - it was a beautiful day. My son and his sweet girlfriend Chelsea attended and my ex-husband with his family was also there. I'm thankful we have a good relationship and can enjoy outings together.

There was a big Turkey at the petting zoo. Those things are UGLY. But the Guinea was also a rather unattractive bird as well.

Have a great week all!

Oh and 416 days until I turn 50.

Monday is Here!

2010-05-24T08:29:00.003-04:00

And as always it gets here oh so fast!

Before I forget - 424 days until I turn 50!

This weekend I did a 2 mile walk/run and my back and ab exercises given to me by the chiropractor. By Saturday night it was QUITE evident that I had been negligent in doing any type of abdominal exercise. That workout pain hit me hard, but it's a good pain - It is the pain of weakness leaving the body - so I was actually happy for it in an odd way. The rest of my body is still protesting the walking/running program, but since it has to go where I tell it, it is reluctantly participating.

Spent a delightful morning and afternoon with Joesette (AKA Peepers) in Front Royal,
VA chatting and walking, exploring a flea market and then down town Front Royals stores and restaurants. It was a fun time and long over due! Nothing quite like spending the day chatting with a best friend.

Saturday evening I went to a co-workers Tupperware party - so much fun! Thoroughly enjoyed myself!

Sunday was some work on my DT assignments for this month and now I need to post some items that I'm allowed to show - but that will be for the midweek post.

Had a simply amazing meal yesterday prepared by my hubby. He was watching Barefoot Contessa on Sunday morning and said we needed to fix this for dinner. It was so delicious that I know it will become a regular meal at our house!

I need to call the community college today - they have not responded to my inquiries - so I need to contact them to make sure I am ready for school this fall!

Have a wonderful week friends!!

429 Days....

2010-05-19T19:52:00.003-04:00

Do you know what I figured out today? It is exactly 429 Days.....until I'm 50 years old.

That is a milestone....50! That 1/2 of 100.

Do you know what I allowed myself to consider today...well...actually come to accept?

50 is not to old to reach goals, to stretch yourself, to push yourself, to grow and change.

I've been doing a lot of visualizations lately....actually picturing myself doing new things and starting back to old things that I used to love. New things like going to college - talk about scary....at least to me - Old things like actually taking my butt to the gym in my community tonight...and got on the elliptical. I'm visualizing myself doing a completely different job...one that I want and hope to enjoy.

It's empowering. It's enlightening. It's exciting and I'm taking little, tiny baby steps...into the unknown.

Recently...my good friend, Schnauz, shared a couple of incredible websites with the cell. Thank you Schnauz.

One site is Christine Kane - Her common sense approach to the daily life struggles I seem to encounter - along with humor - really help me push through the doubting voices in my head.

The second site is Brave Girls Club - and the daily emails that Melody Ross and her sister KathyWilkins are so incredibly encouraging, uplifting, and seem to speak right to my heart - that I decided to sign up for the Brave Girls Camp they sponsor several times a year. It's held in Idaho and it's 5 days of discovering what brave is to me and incorporating something that is such a part of the me - scrapbooking and paper crafts. My friend, Tigger, also signed up and in July 2011 - we will both attend this camp together. Sign up for their daily emails....you won't be sorry.

While I still have many things I'm working on changing and improving and my goals seem to become more clear - while I go through this incredible journey that I have started - one thing I know and I see....

In 429 days...I am going to be 50 - Fit, Fabulous, and Foxy. Yeah....I know it sounds corny....but I like it.

Look out everyone....I'm on my way.

Weekend Wrap Up....

2010-05-16T21:08:00.004-04:00

Courage is the most important of all the virtues, because without courage you can't practice any other virtue consistently. You can practice any virtue erratically, but nothing consistently without courage.
~MayaAngelou

I'm really focusing on thinking positive and putting visions of reaching goals in my mind the past few months. I've realized there isn't much power in thinking..." I need to start exercising" or "I need to get that closet cleaned out"....so I make myself a short list of things I WILL do - not a list of everything I WANT to do and I do a little happy dance when I finish something. I take the time to enjoy a job well done instead of berate myself for what I didn't get done. And you know what? I'm much happier. I start each day by spending time journaling and writing and reading positive, encouraging books and blogs. I also work to really visualize myself reaching my goals and doing things I want to do - it does work...at least for me.

Last week I talked to two different online univerisities about the programs I am interested in pursuing and I decided to take some of the base courses here at the local community college and then transfer to the other schools to take the concentration courses. The next task is to pick two courses I want to take and get registered for those.

Did some purging of stuff this weekend....I'm taking steps in parting with things I really don't have any attachment to and don't need. Such a good feeling to be getting rid of stuff.

I also got to do some scrapping this weekend, but I can't show it because it's Design Team stuff for Sketches by Tamara.

I also went to the Coach Outlet....again....I have got to stay away from that place. It's like drugs to an addict....I just love that place and yes...I bought ANOTHER purse, but I got 6 other purses out of my closet and put them in the donation pile!!!!

So, as much as I don't want the weekend to end....next week will be another adventure and have opportunities for me to rise above and keep walking on the path to creating me.

Here are few pics I took a couple of years ago....it just feels odd to not have any pics in a post. On the butterfly pic...notice the bee that was flying into the picture...one of those get lucky type of shots.

Have a great week everyone!

A Great Mother's Day

2010-05-11T05:34:00.005-04:00

Here we are, already Tuesday, well into another work week.

I had a great Mother's Day Weekend. While I may be a bit biased, I think I have the BEST son in the world! He left my card by the coffee pot for me, since I am almost always the first to arise. He took the time to write me a lovely note that made me cry. He went and got us breakfast at McDonald's and got me some fun lawn decorations. Chelsea, his sweet girlfriend, joined us for dinner and I got yet another card and lawn decoration. We made kabob's on the grill and they were yummy.

As always, on Mother's Day, emotional thoughts and memories of my own sweet Momma come flooding back. She's been gone 6 years now and I shall always miss her. While doing some redecorating, I emptied a cabinet and found her purse...just the way she left it the last time. Whenever I take it out it makes me smile and cry. I love touching the leather and even though I know exactly what I will find, I open it and go through her wallet. On the very front of her wallet is a picture of my son, her only grandchild. Oh how she loved him - he was the light of her life. Miss you much Momma!

Spring is just wonderful this year....and so far, the last 3 days have been cool enough to not run the AC and I LOVE my AC. My flowers are really filling out and looking gorgeous. I'm enjoying the yard so much this year. Here are a few pics....

AND I've taken another step toward changing careers. I am going to pursue an AA degree in Medical/Healthcare Administration - with my thinking being I have years and years of management experience that I don't want to waste. If my current employer thinks I'm good enough to oversee $100M in contract revenue, then maybe a group of doctors would trust me to run their practice. I have already talked to one online school and will talk to another one today. I hope to make a decision by the end of the week. Wish me luck!

Have a great week Everyone!

Living in the Moment....

2010-05-06T06:00:00.004-04:00

Why is that so challenging for me (and I'm sure others?)

Why is finding something good, rewarding or joyful in all parts of my day, regardless of what I'm doing, so difficult and at times, elusive?

I blame so much of that on my circumstance - For example....I have a very good job. I work for a good company, I have good benefits, I make good money. Bottom line - I don't like what I do - at all. Many people would look at me with confusion saying, you are so good at what you do (I'm sure there are plenty who would disagree), but down deep in my heart - I don't enjoy it, have zero interest in what I do for "my job". But Joy lies in the heart not in the happenstance.

For years I've convinced myself that the possibility of having a job I love - you know....Love what you do and DO what you love, seemed such a foreign concept to me. I am still afraid to venture out and try and find gainful employment doing something I love - because I'm afraid I will come to hate it if I do it for a job! I can't shake the feeling that work should not be something I don't enjoy, well, because it's "work".

Fast forward - I've been allowing myself to make a list of jobs that I would LOVE and I've been looking at what training is needed - another scary thought for this almost 49 year old woman - going back to school - egads!

So I'm going to take a couple of short courses in a couple of areas - some to learn new things, other to hone existing talents.

I'm going to be adventurous and take a baby step out of the comfort of my boat. After all, as some of you have heard said - How can you walk on water if you never get out of the boat? For now...I'll have my life preserver and floaty wings on. After all...it's not the Bearing Sea I'm stepping into...it's just a little puddle - or so it seems!

Have a great day all!

Starting the Day....

2010-04-27T06:14:00.002-04:00

For years, I've started my day he exact same way. Rarely deviating from the orderly steps I thought I could never function without.

For the past couple of weeks, I've been trying to make some changes. Shake things up a bit.

Kind of like breakfast for the soul or taking time to say Good Morning to myself.

I am getting up a little earlier - and I get my coffee and sit and read or write in my journal. I work very hard to not think of work and what NEEDS to be done that day. I take time to feed my spirit, write down the zillions of things going through my head. Taking time to watch the sunrise.

Most days it makes a difference in my attitude - some days....I fall back into the frenzied and harried pace that others set for me and along with that the anxiety and stress comes rushing back in.

But I'm taking baby steps to break my lifelong habit of starting my day with reminding myself of the long and never hope to finish - Things I Have to Do list. Overwhelming myself before I even step out of the shower.

It's a hard habit to break - but I'm finding it a much more peaceful way to start the day.

So Good Morning! Enjoy your day!

Some Observations

2010-04-23T22:14:00.004-04:00

This week I saw:

A mother holding her 4 month old daughter on the plane....a sweet girl who never once fussed.
A mother of a toddler in total meltdown mode - while the father stood by and did nothing - the mother was in tears trying to hold and calm her child - her frustration clearly evident.
A new Premier Design consultant writing thank you notes to customers
The magic of Disney through the eyes of child - my own. As I watched the parade and the fireworks, I found myself waiving at the characters and totally having fun and just living in the moment.
I saw the beauty of sea creatures up close - Killer Whales, Dolphins, Manatees, Baluga Whales, etc - and was mesmerized by how intelligent these amazing animals are.
I saw little children filled with anticipation of seeing their favorite Disney Characters.
I realized taking vacation is necessary and it's been over 10 years since we have taken a real vacation.

It was a busy work week at the conference. This conference is always physically tiring - the pace is non-stop, but I made a choice to open my mind to the possibility that I could have a good time at Disney. I let myself go and I just lived in the moment. A good bit of shopping helped as well - LOL....I think the staff at the Coach store may miss me after I leave Orlando!

I got a lot of yard work done on Sunday - my lack of yard work last year REALLY shows this year. I made my first trip ever to Meadow's Farms on Sunday and let me tell you.....I am in LOVE with that place!

Couple of pics from the week - My friend Candice and I on Saturday and then one of the two of us with Judy Harvell.

It's back to work in the office and the "normal" hectic pace there. Have a great week all!

Greetings from Orlando!

2010-04-21T06:57:00.003-04:00

I don't do well packing for business trips since I only go on a trip once a year. I spend days checking weather, picking outfits and jewelry trying to pack light - alas - it never works! LOL

But I've been in Orlando since Saturday morning. I was truly dreading this trip. I didn't think I'd enjoy Florida or being on the Disney compound. But my hotel, the Dolphin is great. I got to see my good friend Candice on Saturday. Shopped at the Coach outlet (2 bags later.....)I went to Sea World and I loved it! I never wanted to leave! Monday work started and it's a whirlwind of activity when the conference starts.
I talked to lots of customers. I love hearing good things about my company. It makes me feel good!

Last night the Conference sponsored activity was a fireworks show at Epcot. It was an amazing fireworks show! I have attempted to video it - so hopefully it will come out good.

I have spent lots of time thinking about what I want to do when I grow up - and I know it isn't this. I have a couple of careers that I am going to spend some significant time looking into over the next few months to see what education is required/base salaries/ etc...but changes are going to be made at some point.

Looking forward to getting home this weekend!

Here are a couple of pics from Sea World!

Grace....Amazing Grace....

2010-04-11T12:48:00.005-04:00

Grace

Amazing Grace

Have you thought about the definition of Grace lately? There are many definitions – Here are some I found.

1. Seemingly effortless beauty or charm of movement, form, or proportion.

2. A characteristic or quality pleasing for its charm or refinement.

3. A sense of fitness or propriety.

4. a. A disposition to be generous or helpful; goodwill; b. Mercy; clemency.

5. A favor rendered by one who need not do so; indulgence.

6. A temporary immunity or exemption; a reprieve

8. a. Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people; b. The state of being protected or sanctified by the favor of God; c. An excellence or power granted by God.

This morning in the shower I was using a Philosophy shower gel called Pure Grace. And as I lathered up I took the time to enjoy the clean and crisp smell. I looked at the bubbles on my skin and I took the time to feel the hot water run over my body and watch the bubbles roll off my body and down the drain - to be in the moment - not thinking of the many things I NEED to get done and check off my to-do list.

And I cried. Not a lot, just some tears of relief, of happiness, of rest, of discovery, of realization. What did I discover or maybe just take the time to notice and to take joy in the fact that I am ME and that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and maybe, just maybe, I need to show myself a little grace, a reprieve from the constant fear and judgment I am so very good heaping upon myself.

Most of you know that I recently decided to see a therapist. And I have been going and I am getting much out of the sessions – I was very questionable in the beginning. I’m opening myself to reading different things and to even begin to consider feeding my spirit on a regular basis. There are many aspects to who I am. To nurture them, discover them, to find them - I deserve that. My family deserves it. People who are around me deserve it.

One thing I’ve discovered, or at least have admitted to myself, is that I have been unhappy with who I am for longer than I can even pinpoint. Now unhappy does not mean suicidal. It does not necessarily mean depression or any of the other labels that are put on our emotional well-being or Un-being.

I would venture to guess that most of my friends don’t realize this about me.

I OFTEN think to myself:

Why can’t I write like Cynthia?

Why aren’t people drawn to me like they are Tigger?

Why can’t I seem to get as much done as Joesette?

Why aren’t I as smart as my boss, or Schnauz or Barb?

Why don’t people read my blog like they do Jocelyn’s blog?

Why can’t I scrap like Cathy?

And the list goes on and on and on.

And a switch flipped recently. BECAUSE I AM NOT THEM! I am ME. I have talents. I KNOW things and stuff. I AM unique. I AM special. I AM funny. I AM creative. I have things to OFFER to friends and family – Now to learn how to be that person – to know that person and love that person!

So sweet friends, little by little, minute by minute, day by day – this soon to be 49 year old woman, is going to start to create the ART of Donna – the ART of being ME – all the millions and gazillions things that make me up – I’m going to discover, to learn to appreciate and to love.

A life long journey is unfolding, right before your eyes and right before mine.

Random Thought

2010-04-06T21:11:00.003-04:00

I discovered a blog by Christine Kane today.

It was as if I discovered the secret to life - The secret to MY life! A special thanks to Schnauz for posting a link on FB.

Actually, I feel like someone I've never met...KNOWS me....the real me - and introduced me to myself today.

One of my favorite things I found on her blog today....

Getting out of your comfort zone....isn't getting out of bed in the morning! I think that's where I'm at right now....but I don't think that's where my life is supposed to be.

Check out her blog on Imperfection.....

http://christinekane.com/blog/you-might-need-to-become-an-imperfectionist-if%E2%80%A6/

Happy Easter

2010-04-04T16:55:00.005-04:00

It's been a truly wonderful weekend. The weather has been nothing short of perfection. I managed to refrain from doing yard work and allowed my back to rest and heal. So very difficult for me.

I have some exciting news! I was selected to be a member of the Design Team on Sketches by Tamara.... This is my first Design Team. It was a spur of the moment decision to submit and was beyond thrilled when I found out I was selected to be a part of the team! I'm looking forward to working with everyone and I'm looking forward to my first assignments. So be sure to check out the site! So get ready - lots of good stuff will be forthcoming from the entire team at Sketches by Tamara!!!!

I feel like I've come out hibernation! For the first time in months I actually felt like looking at photos, editing and doing some layouts!

Here are some things I worked on this weekend. It felt so good to have some mojo flowing.

I also want to give a little shout out to my friend Barb and fellow Cell member - a brand new CTMH consultant. On the Rachel and Noah layout, I used CTMH Grace paper collection. On the close up you can see some of the words on the paper - the paper was perfect for this layout. Be sure to check out her site at Barb's CTMH site.

Hope everyone had a wonderful Easter weekend!

Spring...Is It Finally Here?

2010-04-01T20:08:00.003-04:00

A gorgeous, absolutely beautiful day here in Northern Virginia. The trees are blooming, flowers are coming out....the sun was shining, truly a spectacular spring day! And the weekend is supposed to be nice too!
Did a little stepping outside my creative box Tuesday and Wednesday....I got my inspiration from Jocelyn - (she inspires me a lot!) http://scrappinmeme.blogspot.com/ - and she has shared some work in her creative journal. So I did some web surfing on creative art journals. I've always scrapped photo's that stirred some emotion or thought...I never thought about scrapping the emotion or feeling.So I bought some water color pencils, some gesso, going to get a few new pens and I've begun working on my own creative art journal...here are a few examples....

A Random Mid Week Post

2010-03-30T12:33:00.004-04:00

I love using sketches when I scrap. It helps me have a jumping off point when I'm feeling a creative log jam.

Sketches by Tamara Had a 5th Tuesday Surprise Challenge and I got to send in a layout for this! I've used Tam's sketches on more than one occasion! Check out her blog to see other great layouts and to see all her sketches!

More rambling - Finally broke down and called the chiropractor yesterday to have my back looked at. He told me I pulled the ligaments on the left side of my pelvis. He also took the opportunity to look down at my pointy high heel shoes and tell me that they aren't good for me. Well, since when was being fashionable - painless? LOL So today since I'm off work, I put on tennish shoes with my jeans and went to Target. I felt like making a sign saying I'm only wearing tennish shoes because my back hurts! I did get him to say that I could wear little heels - AFTER my back got better. Have some simple rules to follow for a few days....no bending at the waist, no lifting over 10 pounds, no walking fast, etc....hot showers and ice are the best treatments - not sitting on a heating pad like I've been doing!

Have a great rest of the week!

March Madness

2010-03-28T20:49:00.002-04:00

It's been a crazy month....I'll call it my own version of March Madness.

Work has been crazy. Anyone who has worked on preparing responses to Federal RFQ's can sympathize and understand the craziness that goes along with proposal preparation. Lots of data compiled, lots of writing, lots of pricing and LOTS AND LOTS of paper. Seeing the thousands and thousands of pieces of paper that go into submitting the response makes me wonder - WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GOVT GOING PAPERLESS? Ha I say! How totally hypocritical of them to ask what how we address going green as a company when we are required to respond with multiple copies of proposal responses in binders!

We also had a friend and his dog Yukon, stay with us while he recuperated from prostrate surgery. Good news, all the cancer was removed.

And while tomorrow is Monday and I worked all weekend, lots was accomplished. Thankfully, we only have to go through exercises like this every 2 or 3 years.

Let's see...some random observations:

This season of 24 is ludicrous. Totally unbelievable. Not even close to the edginess of the previous seasons. Last year was ok...not great but ok.

Criminal Minds, CSI (all three) and NCIS are my favorites. Just started watching NCIS - not totally into it yet, but it's pretty good.

I hate the Brawny paper towel commercials. I'll stay a Bounty user for sure!

I like the commercial with the big sock monkey. It makes me laugh.

Having a lot of back pain the past few weeks. I'm going to call the chiropractor tomorrow - haven't been in years, but I can't seem to stretch the muscles or keep them from going into spasms or knots. It's time to get some adjusting done.

I'll be off to Orlando in a few weeks. The NASA SEWP conference will be held there this year. It's a lot of work for all, but it's always productive and informative and then we manage to find time for fun at the end of the day. I'm going to see my friend Candice while I'm there too.

Isn't the saying that March comes in like a Lion and goes out like a lamb? Well, lets just say....I would be happy to see a lot of lamb this week!

Happy end of March all!

Spring Is In The Air.....

2010-03-16T12:43:00.002-04:00

The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, signs of spring are all around me! I feel like this winter has been hard on me emotionally. I long for the sun's warmth on my face, the feeling of accomplishment after doing the spring yard work of putting out flowers and new mulch, hanging baskets of pretty flowers on the porch....It's not far away, I can feel it in my bones! I want warm days so I can open the windows and air out the old winter smell from the house and then shut them and turn on the AC since I am such an AC kind of girl!

All the tests on my heart came back fine- as I suspected. Everything was in the normal range. The doctor told me that at peak exertion, my heart performs like that of a 30 year old - not bad for someone almost 49. Then he told me what I already know....I need to lose 20 pounds. He broke it down like this...2 pounds a month - in a year that's 24 pounds. Sounds easy...but I gain and lose the same 2 pounds every month! LOL

Work is busy - seems like there is never a slow period anymore. I truly don't enjoy my work anymore and it's time to look for something totally new - outside of the government contracting arena. Not sure what that would be, but it's something I plan on doing. Life is just too short to spend so much time doing something I don't enjoy - at least a little bit.

I did a little scrapping over the past weekend, nothing finished yet, but I'm trying something a little outside my normal - hopefully I'll find some time to finish these projects this weekend and get something up!

Have a great week!

Happy Monday, March 8th

2010-03-08T06:43:00.002-05:00

Spring is so close....I saw a little group of robins this week! I'm going to ignore the Farmer's Almanac that says we could have one more big storm before the end of the month. I'm anxious to freshen up the flower beds, put down new mulch, get flowers planted and start enjoying the beauty of spring. Everything is new again.

Merriam Webster online has this definition of new: Made or become fresh, awoke a new person.

I love that definition - it makes Monday morning much less dreary for me.

I did some spring cleaning this weekend, went and got some paint samples from Lowes to pick colors for the living room and dining room. Painting is a way for me to totally change the look and feel of a room without a big dollar investment. I also recovered two little footstools in my living room with a $6 table cloth on clearance. I'll post some pics later. I was quite proud of my little bargain re-do.

Hope everyone has a great week!

Donna

Tests are Done!

2010-03-03T20:27:00.003-05:00

All my heart tests have been completed. The final test was the nuclear stress test. I meet with the dr. next week to go over the results. But two of the tests have come back "satisfactory" - I hope that isn't like a grade of C and I need to improve to a B or an A! I should get the preliminary results tomorrow. I was also the youngest person getting the test today. The doctor will meet with me next week. My biggest challenge was NOT having caffeine for 24 hours before the test! But I survived!

One thing I'm looking forward to this month is the Third Birthday Bash at ScrapFreak.com!

Come check out the Birthday forum for some great inspiration! The girls there are so talented and there will be LOTS of challenges! Here is the link to the Birthday Thread http://www.scrapfreak.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=166

I am really starting to crave creating again....I've been on a bit of dry spell and I think the mojo is flowing - maybe just a trickle, but it's there.

The week is half over! And on Friday I will go meet my friend Cindi Allen for dinner. She's had some upheaval in her life and we both need this time to just go eat and chat and relax and be girl friends!

I need to take my camera.

Friday, Part Two

2010-02-26T17:38:00.003-05:00

Love me some Jocelyn!

Her blogging never fails to make me smile. I look forward to Friday Mornings and her mid-week blogs. Her creativity, her joyful spirit, and stories of fun with her family always makes me smile!

I was so surprised to see this little blog award she gave me and 5 other blog friends this morning.

The rules for this award....place the award in your post or within your blog, pass this award to six of your followers, link the nominees to your post, let the nominees know they have received the award by commenting on their blog, share the love and link to the person you received the award from.

So I will follow the rules....

Here are six blogs that I love to visit....go check them out!

Tigger
Cathy
Monica
Lynette
Judy
Candice

So, as I mentioned in my earlier post today...I've embarked on a journey. Something I never thought I would do. It's really not THAT big of a deal, but it was a huge step for me to admit that maybe I need some help dealing with things. After the turmoil of the last couple of years, I've noticed a lot of changes in myself that I didn't like and didn't know how to deal with anymore and I found myself losing my temper at the drop of a hat and feeling angry and down most of the time. I truly believe my emotional distress, which I've tried to ignore is a big contributor to my racing heart, inability to sleep without medication, withdrawal from friends and just not wanting to do anything, in general being overwhelmed by everything in my life.

I went to my dr and told her that while I think I do need medication (at least for now), I take Wellbutrin for depression, that I didn't feel my problem was entirely physical - that perhaps I needed to talk to someone. My doctor, being the fabulous person she is, agreed and recommended a therapist to me. I had actually tried to call 3 other therapists in our area before going to ask my dr....never got a response - so I guess going to this particular person was the right choice.

After much soul searching and trying to ignore the obvious - I chose to place that call. I have met with my therapist twice now. Since I had no pre-conceived notions of what to expect, I have to say it was a good decision for me. I am surprised at the ability to open up and talk about things that I haven't talked about in years or ever for that matter. I think my hubby was a little nervous about it, but I explained that I needed to do this for me and he is behind me 100%.

While I won't share all the details for the entire internet to read, I will be sharing some things I learn about myself during this journey.

Who knows what the future will bring, but for now, I feel good about this decision.

Thanks friends....Have a wonderful weekend!

TGIF! February 26th

2010-02-26T07:20:00.000-05:00

It's been a long week! And I'm so glad to see the weekend!

Today is the Chili Cook Off at work and I must rush out the door for work, but wanted to tell all my blog friends...Happy Weekend!

I'll post pics later of our cook off and I wanted to share a bit about the journey I have begun.

Just a few more hours until the weekend is here!

Good Weekend

2010-02-21T17:00:00.003-05:00

The sun was shining - snow was melting....yay! Just like magic, sidewalks are reappearing, brown grass is showing....before we know it, the trees will be budding and we'll be complaining about allergies and pollen on our cars.
Had a bit of scrap mojo this weekend.....finished one page of a two page layout - (who knows, maybe I'll go finish the second page before the weekend is over). I found some pictures of my mother. She was with a large group of friends at the Hotel Peabody in Memphis, TN - during WWII. It was a great picture in the restaurant - everyone was smiling and laughing. The Hotel Peabody is still in existence today. I was reading some of the notes on the pictures and I found out her nickname was Oddie (her maiden name was Odum). There is so much I really never knew about my mother - she wasn't one to talk about her past. I do enjoy looking at the pictures of her during her military service - she really enjoyed that time.
We had lunch at Logan's Roadhouse today - an early birthday celebration with my son. As odd as it sounds - we gathered with my ex-husband, his wife and Rick's half sister, Colleen. All of us really do have a good time. My sweet boy will be 25 on Tuesday - my how fast time flies!
I was looking through some older layouts and I came across this one I did for a circle journal swap. I used BoBunny papers that I bought at Scrap-Central.org. I love Bo-Bunny papers. Go check out Kelly Jo's store - she has Basic Grey on sale at some great prices. I just ordered 4 different pkgs.

Had a hair appointment on Saturday. Nothing perks me up like fresh hair color and a cut. I'm going to start going lighter a little at a time and I'm letting my hair grow out just a bit.

Have a great week everyone!

Snow Madness....

2010-02-17T20:01:00.003-05:00

Winter blahs....whatever it is....I think I have it.

We had a nice valentines day. We don't typically do anything, but my son fixed Chinese food from scratch for his sweet girlfriend, Chelsea. He of course made enough for us and he did a great job. Everything was so yummy. He made Fried Rice, Beef and Broccoli, and General Tsao's Chicken. He was VERY successful in making a gigantic mess in the process, but he cleaned it all up. I helped with questions and made a couple of suggestions about loading the dishwasher as he went to keep his work space free of clutter.

Work is busy and I think everyone is a little crabby with the long, cold, snowy weather.

I had to see a cardiologist this week due to some chest pains I've been having for about a month. The pain got worse in the last week and I finally told my hubby Sunday night because the pain was pretty intense. I refused a trip to the ER since the pain was localized, no breathing problems and my bp was normal. But I did see my regular dr on Monday afternoon and after 2 EKG's there, I was sitting in the cardiologist office less than 24 hours later. Mind you...I still think it's a pulled muscle - but that didn't explain the "blip" on the EKG. So now I have 3 tests coming up....the halter monitor for 24 hours, an echocardiogram and then a nuclear stress test which takes about 4 hours. With my history of HBP, family history of cardiac problems and lets face it...dropping estrogen - it increases my chances of developing heart problems. So they are going to try and rule out any heart issues.

I am trying to get some scrap mojo going - but I just can't seem to find a subject to scrap that just makes me unable to resist the urge to go create. I think it's the snow madness.

I have become addicted - once again - to the TV 24. I just love me some Jack Bauer. I also watch Criminal Minds even though it does give me weird dreams occasionally. The three CSI series are also something I watch - On Demand is my friend.

My new favorite HGTV show is Holmes on Homes....he's just dabomb. Luff him!

Now to go read a few of my favorite blogs...like Jocelyn's.....and Oops, I Craft My Pants....the title makes me laugh.

Does fragrance bother any of you? I used to love wearing my favorite fragrance - Chance by Chanel. But I've become more aware of people who wear a little too much fragrance and those who feel marinating in the vat of their favorite fragrance is a good thing. So I have gotten out of the habit of wearing my fav scent to work every day. Most of the time a person's fragrance doesn't bother me - some I like, some I don't - but I walked into a small conference room to have a meeting with two men and the cologne was overpowering....I swear it sucked the air out of the room.

One of my co-workers discovered today - I am a BSP. Booger Sensitive Person. Things to do with Boogers and nose drainage...make me gag - fast. Once that little weakness was uncovered, I was tortured this afternoon. I have to admit, I was laughing, but eeeewwwwwww......

So that's my rambling for today....nothing exciting or insightful - just rambling.

Blizzard 2010

2010-02-07T09:15:00.003-05:00

Well...I guess those snow dances I've been doing for the past 3 years finally paid off. Who would have thought that it would really work - I mean - REALLY work?

I can assure everyone, I have done my last snow dance. Snow...Schmo....

The first storm was magical and beautiful. Now...after this latest storm...it's just work. Lots and lots of work.

I did get a full day of work in on Friday as it didn't begin sticking until around 4 pm here in Gainesville. I even said - HA - if we are gonna get the accumulations they are predicting...it better start sticking soon. When will I learn to keep my mouth shut and quit challenging the snow gods?

Here are a few pics from this particular storm.

I want to go out for a walk today and capture some action shots.

We had an amazing dinner last night. An idea I got from my boss, Grilling in the Snow, has become our new tradition. So last night we had some absolutely perfect steaks, grilled by Rick, homemade garlic dill rolls made by the hubby and I baked the potatoes and steamed the broccoli. It was delicious!

And my sweet son informed me that I am not allowed to shovel snow. He's a good kid. I don't mind shoveling, so I may head out and do a bit this morning -...ssshhhhhh don't tell anyone.

Remember When......

2010-02-01T07:55:00.002-05:00

For those of us in our Mid 40's to Mid 50's -

Do you remember your office before fax machines?

I'm sure many of us remember our office before email!

Important documents were delivered by courier. One company I used to work for had a daily courier run between our office and the corporate office. It was done by the same wonderful elderly gentleman - Mr. Bushrod.

Remember paper phone messages?

Remember companies having their phones answered by a person?

Remember when you could call your dr and immediately tell the person you need an appointment instead of waiting to hear which number to push - just to leave a message to be called back some time that day?

Ahhhh.....the good ol' days.

While some of the technology advancements are wonderful and very useful, I often feel that I have so many "urgent" things to attend to that I get overwhelmed and KNOW that I will never get it all done today.

It is virtually impossible to try and set aside some segment of time to work on a task and get it done. To me, managing my time means forwarding my office phone to voice mail, I turned off the pop up reminder in outlook that would flash on my monitor for every single email received - Just so I can manage the "incoming" information and data at a pace that works best for me. I feel as if my "hard drive" has a 20 MB capacity while I'm required to process 100 MB of data constantly flowing in.

I don't enjoy the pace of today's workforce - not at all. People work longer and longer hours just to be rewarded with more and more work.

There must be a way to balance it all - at least part of the time.

The End To Another Weekend Looms....

2010-01-31T15:57:00.004-05:00

Let's see....we had about 5-6" of snow yesterday....and it's really cold out there!

Work was busy last week, I have a lot on my plate for next couple of weeks. But hey, I have a job right!

Ordered some new books off of Barnes & Noble with their clearance sale and got free shipping. I'm finding sitting (or laying) and reading in the evenings really helps me unwind from the work day.

Not feeling very scrappy lately, so I'm going to clear off my scrap table and put away things in progress and let my creative juices take a little break. I'm going to do a lot of blog hopping and make some notes of things I want to try.

However, I did win a prize on the Who's That Girl Blog....lookie! I was sooo excited! It really gave me a lift!

http://jessicabree.typepad.com/whos_that_girl/

Taxes...bah humbug....enough said.

Had a cleaning/organizing burst hit me yesterday - got lots done.

So...today...outside my window, once again...is snow!

Creating - not too much right now - the mojo is not flowing.

Here is a great new sketch blog! Love me some sketches!
http://sassylilsketches.blogspot.com/

Excited - about my new books on the way from Barnes & Noble.

Looking forward to seeing my friend Peepers next Saturday since Old Man Winter canceled our lunch for this weekend!

Journaling....I used to journal - a lot. I haven't done it for years. I'm feeling the urge to just "vent" and get things out of me - I feel like I've been keeping so much pent up and I don't think it's good for me.

Other than that...a busy work week ahead.

Have a wonderful week everyone! Stay Warm!

YAY!!! It's Friday!

2010-01-22T08:43:00.000-05:00

It's Friday and payday! Wahooo!

Been a good week for the most part. Looking forward to no alarm clock on Saturday and Sunday. While I'm not a person who sleeps late (rarely past 7:30), I just love the feeling of waking up when my body says it's time to get up. How I ever got up at 4:30 am on a regular basis is beyond my comprehension right now.

I'm planning on going to Scrapdoodles tomorrow with Slush. She is my friend from the Freak. We always hit Chik fil a when we go too!

Sunday - we may be shopping for a new family room sectional.

I feel as if I am in a bit of a winter funk. January to me is such a dreary month....all the holiday fun is over and there isn't a lot going on - I'm already looking forward to spring. However, for some odd reason, I wouldn't mind getting hit with another big snow storm! One that starts on a Friday and you have the weekend to just enjoy the beauty and silence a storm brings to the rush-rush everyday life.

Have a great weekend everyone!

For Today....January 17, 2010

2010-01-17T20:13:00.004-05:00

It was a good week. Feeling better and better.

We went to Outback Steakhouse for dinner tonight, with my son and his lovely girlfriend Chelsea. It was a fun evening.

Today....

Outside my window...It was cloudy and rainy today.

I am thinking...Less than ONE hour until Season 8 of 24 starts! Love me some Jack Bauer!

I am thankful…that I am feeling better!

From the kitchen...Big Sunday Breakfasts….are nice. We had eggs, bacon and biscuits this morning. YUM.

I am wearing...My jammies!

I am creating...More Layouts….did 2 layouts this weekend. One for a challenge at “Who’s That Girl”. A new Challenge blog. Go here to see it. http://jessicabree.typepad.com/whos_that_girl/ Here is the layout I did. I'm including a pic of the "word" since I got some flashback on the picture.

I am going...to Scrapdoodles next Saturday! We don’t have a lot of scrappy stores nearby. So I make the most of my trips there!

I am reading...Basket Case by Carl Hiassan

I am hoping...that the people of Haiti continue to receive aid they so desperately need. The devastation that country has experienced just breaks my heart.

I am hearing...QVC on my TV (same as last week).

One of my favorite things...Curling up on the couch and watching TV, unwinding and relaxing before bedtime.

From my Pictures…..

Have a great week everyone!

For Today.....

2010-01-10T19:44:00.003-05:00

FOR TODAY
January 10, 2010
Outside my window...It was sunny today. Some snow piles still left…they are dirty now and not very attractive!
I am thinking...Of my late brother. He would have been 47 today. Wow….NOW I feel old.
I am thankful for...that we got the Christmas decorations down and put away! My son and hubbyhelped me! Thanks guys!
From the kitchen...Domino’s was King in our kitchen tonight. Love the changes they made.
I am wearing...Grey comfy pants and black shirt. Soon to be my jimmies.
I am creating...Layouts….did 6 layouts this weekend…a LOT for me.
I am going...to work tomorrow!
I am reading...Nothing really, but I am going to the book store tomorrow!
I am hoping...that I continue to feel better and I’ve finally kicked all this illness!
I am hearing...QVC on my TV and my husband coughing
Around the house...My husband is sick now….
One of my favorite things...Being Scrappy!
A few plans for the rest of the week – Bookstore – I need some new books.
Here is picture for thought I am sharing...A layout I did last year of my brother and I as children.

Have a wonderful week friends!

Quick Update....

2010-01-08T10:08:00.000-05:00

I'm feeling better! Finally! The new antibiotic and the steroids must be doing the job. Definitely NOT 100%, but oh my gosh, a marked improvement. I've only had 1 really bad coughing spell this morning.

Thanks to everyone for all the get well thoughts!

Today....

2010-01-07T09:20:00.004-05:00

Outside my window... It is cold, cold, cold. Snow is left from our December Blizzard. I think it will be here a while.

I am thinking...Being sick is no fun.

I am thankful for...A great son! He did grocery shopping for me last night since both me and hubby is sick. He is awesome.

I am wearing...gray cords, black shirt.

I am remembering...Sleeping with my Bugs Bunny when I was little.

I am going...be working at home today. I need to get some things done since I've been home sick almost all week and I'll probably be going to the dr for a check up.

I am currently reading...Grave Sight by Charlaine Harris

I am hoping...blogging becomes more popular again. I prefer blogs over facebook.

On my mind...getting over bronchitis and how much not having my Christmas decorations put away (due to being so sick) is really bothering me. I can't stand it much longer.

Noticing that...my word of 2010 - Persevere is very applicable right now!

Pondering these words...Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home (Bill Cosby). And I have to say....having DS move back in in May has been more joy than I imagined.

From the kitchen...I NEED to get out this weekend and get my new dishwasher. I've been too sick to go out and shop for one and doing dishes all the time is no fun. I love my modern conveniences!

Around the house...It's quiet. Cats are sleeping. Husband is downstairs with his sick self.

One of my favorite things...My first cup of coffee in the morning.

From my picture journal...My friend Dorothy who is currently living in Japan with her family! Isn't she adorable?

Please go see The Simple Woman's Daybook - this is where this idea originated. Gotts be sure to give credit where credit is due.

http://thesimplewomansdaybook.blogspot.com/

REST....

2010-01-05T20:04:00.002-05:00

The definition of Rest?

1 : repose, sleep; specifically : a bodily state characterized by minimal functional and metabolic activities
2 a : freedom from activity or labor b : a state of motionlessness or inactivity

I am not good at resting. I feel guilty doing nothing.

I had to go the doctor on Monday. I have bronchitis bordering on pneumonia. I have meds and was told to stay home and rest.

Now I would tell anyone else to follow the doctors orders.

But WHY do I feel I am outside the rules? I hate doing nothing. I hate feeling bad. I've been a grump for a week now.

So send good thoughts for the hubby...I'm sure he's ready to run away from home by now!

Happy New Year!

2009-12-31T15:35:00.012-05:00

December 31st....New Years Eve.

A new year looms on the horizon. 2010 - Wow.....The last year in my 40's. In 2011 I'll turn 50!

I think this will be a great year. I'm not making resolutions...they never last and after all, each day is new and brings with it new challenges and rewards- so no resolutions for me.

I did pick a word for the year - Persevere - to persist in a state, enterprise, or undertaking in spite of counterinfluences, opposition, or discouragement. I picked this word because I tend to get overwhelmed when I'm faced with many stressful things at the same time. So I want to not over-react to things beyond my control, to take time to think things through before reacting, to persevere through any challenge and also keep up with doing things I know are good and healthy for me. I won't beat myself up if I miss a day of exercise, but realize tomorrow is new and I can always start over.

Some favorite things of 2009:

- Rick moving back home in May - at first it was an adjustment, but I have had many fun movements with my grown son these last few months. I've enjoyed his company.

- Surviving the renewal of my company's GSA schedule. GSA is the the most antiquated govt agency out there and it was a frustrating and maddening process, but on September 30, 2009, 14 months after beginning the process, I got our 5 year contract extension.

- Watching sweet Charles Bradford Leininger enter the world. Thank you Pam and Doug for allowing me that honor.

- Watching Rachel marry the man of her dreams, Noah.

- Watching Ashley marry her awesome Anthony.

- My annual beach trip with the "Cell".

- Kind of goofy - but I thought Susan Boyle was phenomenol....watching her WOW everyone with her voice was uplifting.

- Having Jocelyn find me through my blog - what a blessing she is. Even though we have not met in real life, her blog is uplifting, inspiring, thoughtful and a joy to read. Check her blog out.

http://scrappinmeme.blogspot.com/

- Watching La from the Freak begin a huge and exciting journey of weight loss.

http://www.thecurvylife.blogspot.com/

- The Blizzard of 2009 - We had a white Christmas this year!

- I scrapped a lot this year.....I'm happy with my accomplishments. My last layout of 2009 - little surprise it's of Pam and her beautiful family.

It will be a quiet celebration this year, both Mike and I are sick so we are staying home and watching the last season of 24.

Happy New Year Everyone!

100 Mile Challenge

2009-12-29T18:10:00.002-05:00

Check this site out....and be sure to read La's amazing JOURNEY she is on! She so inspires me. I've never met La IRL - I only know her from ScrapFreak - but she is just so motivating!

I signed up for the 100 mile challenge she is hosting - go here to check it out!

http://www.thecurvylife.blogspot.com/

And I did 30 minutes on my Wii Fit tonight - I am enjoying exercise for the first time in so long. I'm sweating and my heart rate is up - and that's the goal! 3 days in a row! And my hubby enjoys the boxing. We all enjoy the bowling. For the first time in forever, we all actually hang out together and play this video game. I still can't believe it's me on a video game - never been a fan - but the fun it's bringing into my home is just tremendous.

Thanks La - for being so amazing!

2009-12-26T10:17:00.005-05:00

For Today....Monday December 28th.

Christmas 2009 is officially in the history books. It is the best and most fun Christmas I can remember in years - at least since my son was younger. All three of us had fun and laughed lots. I'm going to do some scrapping this morning and start taking the decorations down.

Outside my window...Much of our snow is gone and it's a beautiful, sunny day here in Virginia.

I am thinking...of how much fun I've had kicking my hubby's and son's rear ends in Wii boxing!

I am thankful for...being off work all this week - I'm on call a couple of days - but that's not a big deal.

I am wearing... my jammies.

I am remembering...how good I slept last night - without ambien.

I am going...to do my Wii Fit and some scrapping today.

I am currently reading...nothing....don't have a book I feel like reading.

I am hoping...to get a few layouts in Hannah and Charlie's albums done.

On my mind...Getting the house back in order.

Noticing that...Lots of the regular news people are on vacation.

Pondering these words...Life - Your life - is the Party to which you're invited. Show up and dance 'til you break the straps on your shoes! That means refusing to sit out a number. Dance them all and don't worry about the steps!

From the kitchen...Nothing...it's time to get back to regular eating!

Around the house...Christmas Carnage is still visible. Wanting to get it all cleaned up.

One of my favorite things...Sleeping and just waking up....no alarm clock jarring me our of a sound sleep!

From my picture journal...Rick and Chelsea on Christmas day.

2009-12-22T06:16:00.003-05:00

For Today....

I am loving blogs again! I'm rebelling against fb. I got this idea from Monica at Scrap Freak...http://scrapfreak.typepad.com/ and Mara at Scrap Freak http://studiolorange.blogspot.com/2009/12/monday-daybook-solstice-eve.html - I think it's a great idea so I'm gonna try this for a while. Thanks ladies for a great idea.

Outside my window... cold with over a foot of new and beautiful snow - In Washington DC in December - historic!

I am thinking... it's time to get up and get ready for work.

I am thankful for... for a job and a warm home.

I am wearing... my jammies....I NEED to get ready for work.

I am remembering... the magic of Christmas as a child.

I am going... to see the dr this afternoon - to discuss my latest mammogram/sonogram results.

I am currently reading... Blogs....LOL....need to get some books to read over the holiday.

I am hoping... for no bad weather on Christmas Eve. We have gatherings with family and friends.

On my mind... Finishing up a few Christmas tasks.

Noticing that... it didn't take long for people to return to the normal hustle bustle of life after the snow plows went through.

Pondering these words... Twas the Night before Christmas...and all through the House...

From the kitchen... Deciding on our Christmas meal.

Around the house... Get the husband and son to finish wrapping so I can put that mess away!

One of my favorite things~ Quiet mornings with my coffee

From my picture journal...

This is a picture of our sweet Shelby in 2007. She enjoyed the snow as long as it wasn't too deep for her little legs.

Monday - December 21st

2009-12-21T06:47:00.002-05:00

Good morning all!

Guess What! We had snow over the weekend! LOL

I will admit, at first, I doubted the forecasters. Then I was annoyed by the timing - I mean, how many of us were "completely ready" for Christmas?

On Friday, I went to the grocery store on Friday afternoon, along with 98% of the population of the metropolitan area. I was more than a little grumpy as I parked at the back of the parking lot, found a cart and made my way inside.

And then I stopped and looked around. I saw so many frowns and just a few smiles. I decided to put a smile on my face and join the minority. I didn't get upset at the crowded isles or long lines. My boss had mentioned that they always grill out when it snows - and that entire idea turned my mood around. I quickly decided to steal that idea and my hubby and I grilled hot dogs on the grill Saturday night and had tater tots and baked beans! It was fun - so much fun.

Even with all the shoveling - I never let my mood turn bad. I enjoyed the forced quiet a storm of this magnitude brings to our area - utter silence, except for the sound of falling snow. It's a magical time.

I'm going to have one heck of a scrapbook from this weekend!

More Blizzard Pics...

2009-12-20T11:43:00.002-05:00

I have grown up, non-snow to do...but I had to post a couple of quick pics....

A few more pics...Frosty...breaking out the alcohol....

Oh the Weather Outside is Frightful....

2009-12-19T09:58:00.005-05:00

But I'm finding it soooo delightful!

I gave up being "freaked out" by our beautiful snow storm and gave in to enjoy the magic of it all.

I'm going to be taking pics to document the storm and I'll be updating here!

Everyone be safe, stay home, and enjoy this wonderful, beautiful day!

Our yummy baked potato soup is done.

Here is a new pic of "Frosty".