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Thursday, May 6, 2010

Living in the Moment....

Why is that so challenging for me (and I'm sure others?)

Why is finding something good, rewarding or joyful in all parts of my day, regardless of what I'm doing, so difficult and at times, elusive?

I blame so much of that on my circumstance - For example....I have a very good job. I work for a good company, I have good benefits, I make good money. Bottom line - I don't like what I do - at all. Many people would look at me with confusion saying, you are so good at what you do (I'm sure there are plenty who would disagree), but down deep in my heart - I don't enjoy it, have zero interest in what I do for "my job". But Joy lies in the heart not in the happenstance.

For years I've convinced myself that the possibility of having a job I love - you know....Love what you do and DO what you love, seemed such a foreign concept to me. I am still afraid to venture out and try and find gainful employment doing something I love - because I'm afraid I will come to hate it if I do it for a job! I can't shake the feeling that work should not be something I don't enjoy, well, because it's "work".

Fast forward - I've been allowing myself to make a list of jobs that I would LOVE and I've been looking at what training is needed - another scary thought for this almost 49 year old woman - going back to school - egads!

So I'm going to take a couple of short courses in a couple of areas - some to learn new things, other to hone existing talents.

I'm going to be adventurous and take a baby step out of the comfort of my boat. After all, as some of you have heard said - How can you walk on water if you never get out of the boat? For now...I'll have my life preserver and floaty wings on. After all...it's not the Bearing Sea I'm stepping into...it's just a little puddle - or so it seems!

Have a great day all!

4 comments:

Jocelyn said...

Good For you!!!! Change is tough...it is scary and I can so remember when I left my Fabulous well paying job to seek an unknown profession...My friends all thought that I was crazy...and at times I did too...but I returned to college in my late 30's and forged through to finish my Masters Degree and became an Addiction Counselor/Social Worker...There were times that I thought...what have I done...and I was even just considering going back to school to take some classes in areas that interest me!!!

YOU DO IT....you take that Baby Step...and when you complete that step you are going to look in the mirror and see a BIG SMILE!!! I will be your #1 Cheerleader!!!! Maybe we can pop one of the Floaty wings!!! :-)

Enjoy your day sweet friend!!!

Lynette said...

You are on your way. One step at a time.

CK Photo said...

You can't climb a mountain in one step. But one step at a time.

Cathy said...

Good for you! I so wish I had more belief in myself and the motivation to go and do and better myself. I'm sick of sitting at the same desk for 23 years with no room for advancement because I work in a mans world. I'm just the pissing post for all their screw ups while they sit back and make the big bucks. UGH!